Masterbate Jokes

What did the masterbating Australian mortician do?

Cremate

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What do you call a cow masterbating?

Beef stroganoff

What sound does a baby make when you put it in a microwave?

I don't know....I was too busy masterbating.

What do you call 100 cows masterbating?

Beef Strokenoff

What do you call a rapper who masterbates a lot?

Lil Wayne-ker

Why does Helen Keller only masterbate with one hand?

She needs the other to moan.

What do you call a masterbating cow?

Beef stroganoff

Why did Helen Keller masterbate with one hand?

So she could moan with the other

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Cow Jokes More Cow Jokes

What do you call a cow that gives no milk?

An udder failure.

Why are cows so famous?

Because they're out-standing in their field.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What scratches the window before it explodes?

A baby in a microwave

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.

Beef Stroganoff Jokes More Beef Stroganoff Jokes

What do you call a cow that plays with itself?

Beef Stroganoff

What's do call a masrbating cow?

Beef stroganoff...

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How to you know that cows will be in heaven?

It's a place of udder delight.

How do hens always know what size your egg cup is?

They don't but all eggs always fit.

Moan Jokes More Moan Jokes

Why was Barbie kicked out of the toy box?

Because she kept sitting on pinocchio's face moaning, "lie to me!"

Why are ghosts always just moaning?

Did your manners die too Use your words!

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why do Spanish beaches have a lot of women?

Cos they're playas.

Why the turnout at Michael Jackson's funeral?

He touched a lot of people.

Australian Jokes More Australian Jokes

How could I forget, mate?

At an Australian parliament meeting, two guys were shouting back and forth and one said: "I am a country member!" and the other said: "Oh, I remember!"

How does an Australian clean is bum?

Bidet, mate.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

Why did 20 blondes stand outside the bar?

Because you need to be 21 to get in.