Procrastinate Jokes

When's the best time to procrastinate?

Later.

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Why do people procrastinate?

I'll tell you later.

What do you call a fruit that procrastinates?

A Cramberry!

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Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

What do you suppose Ray Rice's fiance' did when he got her home from knocking her out?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her!

What am I supposed to take tomorrow?

Doctor: That was a 30 day supply. Me: Whoops.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What's the difference between my job and my boss's daughter?

I'm not coming into work today

What's the difference between the jokes from today and next week's jokes?

The posters.

People Jokes More People Jokes

How many people work at your company?

About half of them.

What do you call a notebook where you record information about your poops?

Some people may call it a log journal, while others call it a diary-a.

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What do you can an epileptic What do you call an epileptic in a garden?

Seizure salad. edit: fixed the word 'call'

What's reddit without the R&ampD?

Edit:

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell if someone's an introvert?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

How do you know whether somebody is a vegan?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Good Time Jokes More Good Time Jokes

When's the best time to take your doberman pinscher for a walk?

Anytime he wants to go.

What's the integral of 2x with the limits from 10 to 13?

A good time)

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What kind of math do owls like?

Second Caribou: Owlgebra.

What's the fastest animal in the world?

A chicken crossing Ethiopia. What's the second fastest animal... The ethiopian chasing it.

Nation Jokes More Nation Jokes

What type of government would a nation ran by Alvin and the Chipmunks be called?

A theocracy.

What nation is the most unjust?

Discrimination