What did the hippy who has been crashin...

Let Jokes More Let Jokes

What's the one movie that Rick Astley won't let you borrow?

He's never gonna give you Up.

Why can't you give a balloon to Elsa?

Because she'll Let It Go.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How many ears do Star Trek fans have?

3, Right Ear, Left Ear and The Final Front-Ear.

What did the yoga teacher say when someone asked if she wanted to leave the party early?

Namaste

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

What's the difference between toilet paper and shower curtains?

If you answered "I don't know." I would like to tell you that I spent all day cleaning that mess up.

What question must always be answered "Yes"?

What does Y-E-S spell

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did Donkey Kong say when Mario asked him for help for some schoolwork?

I D K

How to tell the difference between a bad, a good and an excellent accountant?

When you ask them "2+2 is?":

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

What do you call a couch stuffed with chic peas?

A hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.

What did the hippie say when somebody told him to get off of their couch?

Namaste.

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

Why did nVidia build the first self-driving car?

Because their drivers keep crashing.

How many stockholders does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

Y Jokes More Y Jokes

What is a Farmer's favorite pick-up line?

Girl. You look so good that I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!

What do you call a cow that fell in a hole?

A hole-y Cow!

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What do you call it when you second guess your decision to book a stay at a Native American resort?

A reservation reservation reservation. Credit to Brian Regan, this is my favorite joke of his!

What be a Pirates favorite letter?

Ye all must be willin' to guess Arrrr. But ye be wrong! It be the Sea! Yearha har har har

Hippy Jokes More Hippy Jokes

How can you tell if a hippy came to your house?

He's still there.

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit!

Bit Jokes More Bit Jokes

What denomination are the coins in Super Mario Bros?

They're dollar coins, because a quarter is two bits, which means a dollar is 8 bits.

How many IBM CPUs does it take to perform a logical right shift?

32. One to hold the bits and 31 to push the register.

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore?

Am I supposed to pick my favorite

What am I supposed to take tomorrow?

Doctor: That was a 30 day supply. Me: Whoops.

2 Week Jokes More 2 Week Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

What do you call a meth-head that's been up for 2 weeks?

A two-weeker