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What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit!

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

How do cats let us know that they are in pain?

Me...........Owwwwww!!

How about Santa?

Ok but let's add something fierce so they are afraid to defy him

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How was work?

Flashback to me being asked to leave the meeting because I couldn't stop giggling after someone said "abreast" me:Good

What did the Challenger Austronaut day to his wife before he left?

You feed the kids, I'll feed the fishes.

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How did a blind woman pierce her ear?

Answering the stapler.

How long does a United States Congressman serve?

Until he gets caught.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How long have you had this problem?

The doctor asked. "Lest's see" said the patient "Mom had the litter in '41

What did the racist ask Santa for?

A white Christmas.

Couch Jokes More Couch Jokes

What did the hippy say when he was told to get off the couch and get a job?

Namaste (pronounced:nah I'ma stay)

What does a hippy say when you tell him to get off your couch?

Namaste

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes?

Nothing.

Why did you crash into that stop sign?

Motorist: I was only following orders.

Y Jokes More Y Jokes

Why did Ally refuse to do her homework, when all she had left was to square the x and y axis?

Cause Allies don't like axis powers

Why don't X and Z get along with Y?

Because Y so serious

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What next?

Damn. I guess we'll have talk to people in real life.

What do I want to do to your body?

I don't know. Identify it, I guess.

Hippy Jokes More Hippy Jokes

How can you tell if a hippy came to your house?

He's still there.

What does the hippy say when you try to kick them off your couch?

Namaste.

Bit Jokes More Bit Jokes

What are some good conversation starter jokes you can think of?

Just some light jokes with bit of humor. Nothing too dark.

How do you know Kurt Cobain didn't have dandruff?

A bit of his head and shoulders were found behind the couch.

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

Why did the carpenter's wife leave him?

He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her.

How are that many Republicans candidates supposed to debate each other at once?

Throw a dollar bill in the floor and let the last one alive run for president.

2 Week Jokes More 2 Week Jokes

What's the difference between a washing machine and a virgin?

A washing machine doesn't follow the guy around for 2 weeks after he drops a load in it.

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.