Crash Jokes

How many stockholders does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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Why did some chemists go broke?

The bond market crashed.

What is not a truck crashing into people?

Nice.

What did the fish say when it crashed into a wall?

Damn! (This is my go-to joke that someone told me in highschool like 7 years ago. Felt like sharing it.)

What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes?

Nothing.

Why did the blind guy crashed his car into another car?

Because he forgot to check his blind side.

What's the difference between Paul Walker and Windows 10?

Paul Walker only crashed once.

Why did the rich guy crash his car?

He wanted to see how the Mercedes bends

What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?

Tyrannosaurus Wrecks

What object crashes the most?

A kaleidoscope!

Why wasn't the son of God worried when Microsoft Word crashed while he was writing his term paper?

Because Jesus saves.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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What's Paul Walker's favorite energy drink???

N.O.S. too bad he can't handle the crash...

What was the last thing that went through JFK Jr's mind when his plane crashed?

The console. What was JFK Jr's wife drinking when the plane crashed? Ocean Spray.

What do you call a reptiloid that crashed landed its spaceship?

Imsosaurus!

Why did Bill Nye crash his car?

Because inertia is a property of matter.

Why did the drunk fall asleep at the wheel?

He needed a place to crash.

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed?

Nothing.

What do you do if your video card driver keeps crashing?

Take away it's drivers license.

What happened when Red-Beard's ship and Blue-Beard's ship crashed into each other?

They were MAROONED!

What happened when the blue ship crashed into the red ship?

The crews got marooned

Why did nVidia build the first self-driving car?

Because their drivers keep crashing.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you get when you cross a pig with a billy goat?

A crashing bore.

Why did you crash into that stop sign?

Motorist: I was only following orders.

What did the tired pilot say to his crew?

I think I'm gonna crash

Why didn't the LoL champ care when she crashed her car?

Because it was Elise

What did one plane said to the other plane?

Can I crash at your place

What should you do if windows crashes cost you a lot of money?

You should Bill Gates.

What do you call five black cars that all crash into each other?

A three car pile-up.

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit!

What do you call pigs in a demolition derby?

Crashing boars.

What do you call someone who crashes flying dinosaurs into buildings?

A pterrorist

What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks!

Why did the wave fail the driving test?

It kept crashing on the beach.

Why did the leper crash his car?

He left his foot on the accelerator.

Why did the pilot crash the plane?

Because he was a slice of bread

What's the difference between a Malaysia Airline flight and Internet Explorer?

None. Eventually, both of them are gonna crash.

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

What kind of soda do dogs drink?

Barq's Root Beer.

What does Batman put in his drinks?

Just ice.

Jfk Jr Jokes More Jfk Jr Jokes

What was the last thing that went through JFK Jr's mind when his plane crashed?

The console. What was JFK Jr's wife drinking when the plane crashed? Ocean Spray.

Involve Jokes More Involve Jokes

What jokes do you know that can only be understood if you know two (or more) languages?

Like a joke that involves a pun on a word that has different meanings in different languages. Please tell us what languages they are in.

Why was the baseball player arrested?

He was involved in a hit-and-run.

Yo Jokes More Yo Jokes

How do you get into these!?

Yo, evolution: You missed one..

What do you get when yo cross sheep DNA with human DNA?

Kicked out of the petting zoo.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is the first thing they teach you at Gardening school?

WATERRR THOOOOOSSSSSEEEEE!!!!

Where are things that are very average produced?

The satis-factory.

Place Jokes More Place Jokes

Why do cowboys have foreskin?

So they have a place to put there chewing tobacco when brushing their teeth

How is lightning like a violist's fingers?

Neither one strikes in the same place twice.

Airplane Crash Jokes More Airplane Crash Jokes

Why are airplane crashes in the ocean so visible?

They're plane to sea

Why did the airplane crash into the building?

BECAUSE THE PILOT WAS A LOAF OF BREAD!

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What did earth say to the other planets?

You guys have no life!

What's the difference between a guy with a vasectomy and a guy without a vasectomy?

There's a vas deferens.