When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did Steve Jobs lose on the X Factor?

Because Sam sung better than him

Why did Prince William lose his cool?

He wasn't properly heir conditioned.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why did Elvis' mom get mad when people called him "Elvis the pelvis"?

Because he had a brother named Enos.

What is literally the most important fact you'll ever learn, that will totally blow your mind?

That people exaggerate.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What colour pants do you need to start a vehicle?

Khaki

What if we need to hide bodies?

Me: I love you.

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

What did the number 1 say to (pi)?

Let's get rational you can't carry on like this!

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

Why did the phone get away with its crime?

Because it had good connections!

Why did Frodo set his phone to vibrate?

He was afraid the ring would give him away.

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

What happens when you take the tea away from your guest?

He's left there trying to "guess" what happened.

What is the best nickname for a nun in heaven?

If you guessed "Heaven nun" or "Angel nun" you're wrong. The answer was "Nun of the Above".

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

What do you call a girl who expects a guy to do everything for her, make all the first moves, and text her first every day?

SINGLE

Facebook Jokes More Facebook Jokes

What's the difference between a joke and your friend's blog?

You enjoy it when a joke is posted on Facebook

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

2 Week Jokes More 2 Week Jokes

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.