Because they never drink alone.
He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.
It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.
Your holiness
An alcoholic.
Whine.
I told her 'No, thanks. The carton works fine.'
She says "Nothing, just wanted to tell you I'm vegan."
I'll let my friend answer that one:
Jane: I can't answer. I didn't know I was supposed to keep count!
The guy likes his power chords too much.
He was charged with battery!
Four girlfriends drinking on St Patricks Day!
Buckle get you a drink but not much else!
Ping pong.
The sound of the dog screaming at 8000 feet gets to you after a while.
