Situation Jokes

Why didn't the approaching black hole concern the astronaut?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.

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What did the doctor say to the man who walked off the roof of his house?

I don't think you understand the gravity of the situation.

Why don't astronauts take anything seriously?

They don't grasp the gravity of the situation...

What do you call a pachyderm that has nothing to do with the situation?

Irrelelephant.

What did the black hole say to the pulsar?

I don't think you understand the gravity of your situation

What did the mailman say when his Mail truck caught fire?

That he needed to address the situation

Why did the student fail his physics test?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.

Why did the atom stick around?

Cuz if he split, the situation would have gotten blown out of proportion.

How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.

How many bureaucrats does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to assure that everything possible is being done about the situation and the other one to screw it into the faucet.

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1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?

A. 3. 1 to find the bulb 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man.

What the problem?

Man 1: *Sighs* " I guess i'm just having some problems with my inner-sole "

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Pokémon go and my girlfriend?

Pokemon Go always goes down on me

What's the difference between a hippie and a geologist?

Not much. One likes getting stones, the other likes getting stoned.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many light bulbs did it take to screw a human?

None, there not too bright with doing anything except showing us where to go when were lost in the dark

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A lot, apparently. Have you seen their new building?

Match Jokes More Match Jokes

Why did the groom ask his bride to wear white?

Because he wanted his dishwasher to match the fridge and stove

What do you get if you cross a radio music presenter with Match of the Day?

DDDDDDDDDDDDDJ!

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What is she doing?

The pal asks. "Waiting for me to get home."

What happened when the man asked the salesman for a good belt?

O.K. you asked for it" the salesman said as he gave him a good belt.

Pachyderm Jokes More Pachyderm Jokes

What do you call a pachyderm that sings jazz?

Elephants Gerald

What do you call a pachyderm that doesn't matter?

Irrelephant.

Approach Jokes More Approach Jokes

Why didn't the approaching black hole concern the astronaut?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.

How did the dog warn its master that a Gorilla was approaching?

He barked g-r-r-r-illa!

Nguyen Nguyen Jokes More Nguyen Nguyen Jokes

Who loses in a basketball game between two Vietnamese guys?

No one... its Nguyen Nguyen!

What do you call it when two Vietnamese people meet?

A Nguyen-Nguyen situation