Sushi Jokes

What did the girlfriend, say to her boyfriend, when he showed up for sushi?

Wha suh b?

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What type of sushi does Bob Seger like?

That Old Thai Moroccan Roll.

What is the name of the restaurant chain that serves sushi burritos?

Japotle.

What did sushi A say to sushi B?

WASABI!!!

What do you calls sushi in Serbia?

Nishikori

What did Sushi A said to Sushi B?

Wasaaaabi!

Why did the sushi cross the road?

Sushi could get to the other side.

What did the Japanese chef do after he dishonored the emperor?

Commit sushi

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What would you like to Instagram?

How waiters should greet people

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.

Tonight Jokes More Tonight Jokes

How does a yoga instructor turn down an invite?

Namaste home tonight.

What did Dodi Fayed say to his driver?

Want to go out with me and Di tonight?

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did Jay Z call his girlfriend before they got married?

His Feyonce.

What's the difference between a Snickers and my girlfriend?

Snickers satisfies.

Sign Jokes More Sign Jokes

How about an autograph mate?

Sure." He replied. So I signed a photo print of myself and gave it to him.

What sign did the mother put up in her neighbourhood when she realized her child's IQ was below average?

SLOW CHILDREN PLAYING

Pun Jokes More Pun Jokes

What does a cow use to solve math problems?

A *cow*culater. I made it up myself, so don't groan at the pun.

Why was the kleptomaniac frustrated by that joke "why can't you explain puns to kleptomaniacs?

He couldn't take a joke.

Sushi B Jokes More Sushi B Jokes

What did Sushie A say to Sushi B?

Wasa-B! Let's roll.

What did Sushi A said to Sushi B?

Wasaaaabi!

Google Jokes More Google Jokes

Who let the docs out?

Google. Google docs.

Why frogs don't use Google?

They're angry since Froogle was discontinued years ago!

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What does Bill Cosby do when he can't sleep at night?

He finishes her drink EDIT: Apparently this is Conan's joke, so all credit goes to him. I just heard it from a friend of mine and I had no idea.

Why did Elton John's trucking company only work weekends?

Because Saturday nights alright for freighting.