Fail Jokes

What did the failed Swedish chef say?

All that hard Bork and nothing to show for it.

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Why did the Latino Eminem fail in the music business?

Because he had no compaDREs.

What do you call a failing brand?

Calvin DeKlein.

What did the dash say when he failed his exam?

I underscored.

Why did the Boxer Rebellion fail?

They had no Qin

Why did the orange juice fail his math exam?

He wasn't concentrated.

What did the Pie say when he failed a math test?

How did I get these simple questions wrong! I am so irrational!

Why did the rock star fail his depressing math exam?

He couldn't get the saddest fraction.

Why did the student fail the exam?

Spent too much time figuring out the Engels, so he didnt get the Marx.... thats what he gets for Stalin

How did the failing Heroes of the Storm player apologize to their teammate?

I'm gonna level with you.

What do you get in the Netherlands, when you fail your driving test three times?

A yellow license plate.

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Why did the T-Rex fail his business project?

He couldn't make hands meet.

Why did the farmer fail to bring in the whole harvest before winter frost?

He got lost in the maize.

Why did the math student fail his exam?

He needed to sketch the sine and cuisine graphs but only knew how to do cos(-x)

When is a triangle a rectangle?

When it fails

What did the failing kidney say to the healthy one?

Urine charge now.

Why did the guitar shop fail a fire safety inspection?

No Stairway.

Why did the Soviet Union fail?

Too much Stalin'. Yeah it's bad but it made me giggle when I thought of it...

Why did Mrs. Piggy's relationship fail?

She couldn't stand making Kermitments

What did the kidney say to the other kidney when it failed?

Urine trouble now.

Why couldn't the dwarves renew their lease on the Lonely Mountain?

It failed the Smaug test.

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Why did the restaurant on the moon fail?

They barely had any atmosphere.

Why did the hipster fail chemistry?

He thought the bond was ironic.

What's the worst thing about challenging an unjust law?

Failing to get away.

What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his examination?

Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I told them nothing.

Why did the hipster fail making ice cubes for his bourbon?

Because he pulled out the tray before it was cool

Why did the baseball player fail at the math test?

He used base 3.

What did the calculus student who failed his test and the guy who got a speed ticket have in common?

They didn't know their limits

Why did the atheist fail algebra?

He didn't believe in higher powers!

How did you keep from failing that?

I didn't take algebra!

What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?

He stank to the bottom of the pool!

Why do physicists have such a hard time figuring out why their experiments fail Monday through Thursday?

Causal fridays.

Why did my Exotic Bird Startup Store fail?

I didn't have enough seed money.

Who knows where they went?

They just kept wenting. - Why my mystery novel failed

Who do you pat with encouragement when they fail to work?

A Remote control

What did the Illuminati say when they tried to read someone's mind, but failed to do so?

Curses, foiled again!

Why did the horse fail German?

Because he could only say, "neighn!"

How do you fail a urine test with a clean sample?

Poop in the specimen cup.

Why did former Alabama governor George Wallace fail high school calculus?

He refused to integrate.

Why did the student fail his physics test?

He didn't understand the gravity of the situation.

Why did the necromancer fail to meet his quarterly sales goal?

He ran his business on a skeleton crew.

Why did the Naval Inspector fail the submarine?

Because he found it to be SUB-standard.

Why did the Buddhist photographer fail at taking pictures?

Bad cam'ra

Why did Chewbacca fail his driving test?

He made a few Wookiee errors.

Why did the man's kidneys fail?

They didn't study.

What do you call a failed resistance?

Ohmless

Why did the Dino Dance Team fail the Talent Show?

They were all Nervous-Rex

Why did the wave fail the driving test?

It kept crashing on the beach.

What did the Redditor say when... What did Redditor say when asked why he failed his PSAT test?

TL;DR

What do you call an exam that a Biology major almost failed?

Biodegradable.

Why do you keep saying flail?

Because Fail isn't in my vocabulary. ------- Overheard on the train.

What did the gangster's son tells his dad when he failed his examination?

Dad, they questioned me for 3 hours, but I told them nothing!!!

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Anyway you want. Concrete doesn't break easily.

What do eggs do for fun?

They crack jokes.

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Ask them what 'unsigned' means.

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Why did the baseball player fail at the math test?

He used base 3.

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Vote!

What does an Asian man do during an erection?

Vote.

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Whatever shall we do?

Let us spray!" replied the other.

What did the Skunk say at Church?

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What did the Spanish fireman name his 2 sons?

Jose and Hose B

What did Carlos the fireman name his twin newborn sons?

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What does Stalin do on a night out?

Paints the town red

How did the Allies have time to prepare D-Day?

Because Russia was Stalin

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What do you get if you water a melon?

A wet melon.

How do you make a door hold water?

You open it slightly so it's ajar.