Whack Jokes

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

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What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad sky diver?

The bad golfer goes::Whack:: "Damn it!" The bad sky diver goes "Damn it!"::Whack::

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Damn Jokes More Damn Jokes

What's a Jackhammer's Best Friend?

Cast Steel! Bahahahahah! You know! Cause it has a poor dampening value it vibrates so much! They um. They both vibrate. Well ok. One vibrates, the other reciprocates. That's kinda... Hehe. Heh. Reciprocate my humor damn it!

What does Shakespeare say when he is angry with his dog?

Out, out, damned Spot!

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What do you get when you shoot four bullets into a six pack?

A Tupac...

What did Courtney Love say before she shot Kurt?

Hole is gonna be huge.

Skydiver Jokes More Skydiver Jokes

What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?

A golfer goes "Whack, crap!", and a skydiver goes " Crap, whack!".

What's the difference between a useless golfer and a useless skydiver?

The home golfer goes WHACK! "Oh no!" Whereas with the skydiver it's vice versa

What's the biggest similarity between a bottle of Draino and a Danish stripper?

They both slowly remove clogs.

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What did the silly boy take his bicycle to bed with him?

Because he didn't want to walk in his sleep.

What can you sit on, sleep on, and brush your teeth with?

A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a refugee and E.T?

E.T learned English and wanted to go home.

What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer?

One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer.

Crap Jokes More Crap Jokes

What do you call it when a dog craps on your rug?

Carpet bombing.

Why are constipated people so rude?

They don't give a crap

Lumberjack Jokes More Lumberjack Jokes

What did the tree say to the lumberjack?

I'm falling for you

What's awkward for a man but a normal part of the job for a lumberjack?

Morning wood.