How can you tell if the kid that stole your bike is half black and half polish?

He's running down the street with the bike under his arm.

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

How do you know the Statue of Liberty isn't French?

It doesn't have both arms raised. And yes I know the French manufactured the Statue of Liberty and gave it to the United States

What did the guy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why did the kid with muscular dystrophy want to be an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, and a NASCAR driver when he grew up?

He had a lot of aspirations.

What's her first name?

Kid: "Sorry," I think

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a factory worker, and a chemist?

Ask them to pronounce 'unionized'

What do you call an empty cheese whiz jar?

Cheese Was! some old guy came up to me on the street and told me this one.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

Why did the dog run in circles?

He was a watchdog and needed winding.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Why did you steal that bird?

Prisoner: For a lark sir.

What is it called when a thief steals a purse, runs into the street, then gets run over?

Ma

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

Why should you never trust advice from a group of gryphons?

Half of them are lyin'.

What's it called when the bottom half of a fraction has loads of cake in it?

A denom-nom-nominator!

Bike Jokes More Bike Jokes

How do you call a car enthusiast who's interested in bikes?

Bike-curious

Which Elizabethan sailor could stop bikes?

Sir Francis Brake!

Street Jokes More Street Jokes

Why does Bono never get any mail?

He lives on a street with no name.

Why did Sally drop her ice cream while crossing the street?

She got hit by a Bus.