How do you turn a duck into a blues singer?

Leave it out in the sun until its Bill Withers

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What do you call it when Batman leaves church early?

Christian Bale

What's the difference between America any yogurt?

If you leave yogurt alone for 300 years, it develops a culture.

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What did Earth say to the Sun?

My life revolves around you!

Why does the sun set at night?

The moon scares the daylights out of it!

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How do you make a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the oven at three fifty tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers. Edit:summoning happened.

What happens when you put a soul-singing duck in a microwave?

It's Bill Withers.