How long do you need to know someone before sharing fries?

Because I'm about to introduce myself to the girl at the end of the bar.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How much Squidwards does it take to fix a lightbulb?

Zero, because none of them knows how to

How do you know if somebody does crossfit?

They are probably in better shape than you.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

How does R. Kelly respond when girls ask for a rating on a ten scale?

Urinate

What do you call a girl who's preventing you from reaching your goal?

A keeper

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

What day do fries hate the most?

Friday

What are the blonde's first words after 4 years of college?

"Would you like fries with that "

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why were you late?

Sorry teacher I overslept. You mean you need to sleep at home too!

What's the difference between LSD and my dad?

LSD doesn't need to be drunk to hit me.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What does a robot do at the end of one night stand?

He falls off

What begins with an "s", ends with a "x" and leaves a guy blown away?

Semtex.

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

Why the long face?

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face? Horse: because I'm a raging alcoholic.

Why were the Seven Dwarfs kicked out of the bar?

Because they were Miners...

Share Jokes More Share Jokes

Why do babies love sticking things in their mouth?

And why doesn't my girlfriend share this impulse?

How can you tell if it was a shared computer used by many staffers?

There is writing on the White-out.

Introduce Jokes More Introduce Jokes

What do cows do when they're introduced?

They give each other a milk shake!

How do sceptics introduce themselves?

I don't believe we've met...