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How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

He proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What happens when a carpenter drinks with his wife?

He gets hammered and she gets nailed.

What does a guy want more than anything in the world?

It doesn't matter. He has to ask his wife first.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What do you call a turtle who sleeps during the day and is awake at night?

Nocturtle

Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed?

With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

When faced with a challenging situation I calmly ask myself "what would The Hulk do?

Then I rip my clothes and smash stuff up!

What did the couch surfing, yoga junkie say when his friend asked him to leave?

Namaste.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What did the sign convention management do to the woman who kept pulling down their long signs?

Banner.

What's the difference between a man and a woman?

A woman wants a man who can satisfy all her needs. A man wants all women who can satisfy his needs.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What do you call a women who always knows where her husband is?

A widow

Why can't witches get pregnant?

Because all their husbands have Halloween-ies!

Darling Jokes More Darling Jokes

How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

He proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano?

He said "Darling you've got lovely teeth."

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

What exactly is going on?

I asked. He replied, "A Major engineering feet."

When did this start?

And the gentleman replies, "When did what start "