Darling Jokes

What's your Mom's name?

Kid: Mom's last name must be "Darling" because that's what Daddy calls her every time.... Teacher: That's so sweet. What's her first name then? Kid: I think it's "Sorry"....

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What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano?

He said "Darling you've got lovely teeth."

How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, "How many women have you slept with?

He proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did my sperm cross the road?

Because my wife wore the wrong socks.

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!

School Jokes More School Jokes

Where did the piglets study their ABC's?

At a school for higher loining.

What is 007's favorite subject at school?

Chemistry, because he knows a lot about bonds!

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

When asked "why?

He replied, "Tropical Depression."

When I was 3 years old I looked at my nutsack and asked my Mom "Are these my brains?

Not yet," she replied

Moo Hoo Jokes More Moo Hoo Jokes

What is a moo hoo for the bucket that goes at the back end of the cow?

A tail pail!

What is a moo hoo for steak that came late?

Filet delay!

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did the mom say to her son when he said he didn't want any of her flippin' pancakes?

Fine. They will just be burnt on one side.

Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What do you think of Theresa May?

I'm more of a L'Oreal fan

What do you call an Optomitrist who is very highly thought of in his community?

Respectacle

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why did the husband bring his wife's sick dog to the salon?

He was trying to get her pedicure.

Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal?

Because he ate his ant for dinner!

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why did Ken and Barbie never have any kids?

Ken always came in a different box.

What is it that you are both most fearful of?

WIFE: I just...sobbing...don't want the kids to suffer ME: Eels