How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

What do a burnt pizza, frozen beer, and a pregnant girl have in common?

Someone didn't pull it out in time.

Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math?

Because cot(0) doesn't exist... This joke... it burns my eyes...

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why do people go to the gym again?

Do they not know what a nap is

How did Luke Skywalker know what Darth Vader got him for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did the skunk use to contact his girlfriend?

His smellular phone!

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage.. you wanna?

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

How do you stay warm outside in the winter?

You just stand in a corner, they are usually around 90 degrees.

Why can't Russia extradite US top-secret whistle-blowers?

Because they're Snowden (snowed-in). To all the folks on the East coast, stay safe and warm.

Jump Jokes More Jump Jokes

What jumps up and down in front of a car?

Froglights!

Why did the nickel jump off the building but the dime didn't?

The dime had more cents.

Wanna Jokes More Wanna Jokes

How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb?

WANNA RIDE BIKES???

Why do Europeans hate American food?

Europeans don't want to die yet. Unlike Americans who don't wanna diet.

Calorie Jokes More Calorie Jokes

What are calories?

Little elves that tighten your waistband on your pants a little every night

How do fireflies lose weight?

They burn calories.

Conclusion Jokes More Conclusion Jokes

How my girlfriend stay's thin. Wanna know how my girlfriend stays thin?

She burns most of her calories jumping to conclusions.

Why did the introduction and the conclusion break up?

They were just never on the same page...