What did you get 100 in?

Jason: Two things: I got 50 in Spelling and 50 in History. Mother: Well at least you can add!

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

What's the difference between certain and uncertain?

Well, one things for sure

Add Jokes More Add Jokes

How do you turn soup into gold?

You add 24 carats!

How do you add up a mountain?

You summit.

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

Who are some of the best readers in the world?

World Trade Center workers, some of them can read 50 stories in just 8 seconds!

Why did the bachelors purchase double amputee strippers for their party?

Because they were 50% off!

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

What do the wage gap and the story of Hercules have in common?

They're both myths.

How can you spell too much with two letters?

XS (excess).

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

When I was just a little girl I asked my mother, what will I be?

Will I be pretty Will I be rich Here's what she said to me No

What did both the bomb expert and the digital clock maker say to their mother?

Look, Ma! No hands!

History Jokes More History Jokes

What did you get 100 in?

Jason: Two things: I got 50 in Spelling and 50 in History. Mother: Well at least you can add!

Why Mathematics make you a Terrorist?

Because they teach what is the history of Al Gebra.

100 Jokes More 100 Jokes

What do you call a party with 100 midgets?

A little get together.

Whole Foods "All the cash in a bag NOW!" 100% organic reusable bag ok?

Yes!" puts half the cash I had to charge for the bag

Jason Jokes More Jason Jokes

Where does Kylie buy her kebabs?

From Jason's Doner Van. (Sorry, I'm guessing this one's only for the Aussies and Brits)

What is Pitbull's favorite restaurant?

Jason's Dale!