What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between the Pro Bowl and a typical church?

In the Pro Bowl, they give ten percent.

What's the difference between tequila and all of my relationships?

Tequila never goes bad

End Jokes More End Jokes

What does a novice woodworker have in common with a constipated woodworker?

In the end, both are lucky to produce a stool.

Why do gas prices end with 9/10 of a penny?

It just makes cents.

Magician Jokes More Magician Jokes

Why are magicians always sad?

Because everything they have disappears

What do you call a Magician with a Parrot?

Pollygone

Return Jokes More Return Jokes

What does a networking robot say when returning from the bathroom?

Sorry, I http

Why did the storm trooper return his iPhone?

Because it wasn't the droid he was looking for!

Bernie Sanders Jokes More Bernie Sanders Jokes

What did Bernie Sanders say when he found a dead body at a Democratic Party meeting to select candidates and decide policy?

Oh god, a caucus!" cuz he has a new england accent

What do you call wood-smoothing equipment that's hot to the touch?

Bernie Sanders

Wallet Jokes More Wallet Jokes

What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance

Why did the poor art collector only buy miniature paintings?

He wanted more Monet in his wallet.

Performance Jokes More Performance Jokes

Why do galaxies put on boring shows while separated?

Because their performance is lack-cluster.

What is the difference between a magician and Bernie Sanders?

The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance