What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer?

One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a star and America?

The star has a bright future.

What's the difference between a tv remote and a newborn?

You can't play football with the remote.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

Why did the clown started his soccer career?

For kicks and giggles.

What do a baby and an Etch A Sketch have in common?

If you don't like it, you just shake it and start over.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did the necrophile say to his ex-girlfriend?

I only loved you for your body!

How do you play the Oscar Pistorius drinking game?

Every time your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, take two shots

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What does The Lion King have a lot of?

Simbalism

Why are there a lot of problem gamblers in the Harry Potter universe?

Because they have a quidditch.

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What is Dracula's girlfriend called when she gives him head?

Down for the count!

Why didn't Drake head on down to South Park?

He would never leave his woes behind.

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

Who's there! Beryl! Beryl who?

Beryl of beer!

Whats your favourite brand of beer?

When i was younger, i used to drink any brand of beer, but now i am older Budweiser

Ex Jokes More Ex Jokes

What do you call it when an ex pees on you?

EX-STREAM!

Why did Arnold show up at the rodent infested house?

Because he is an ex-Terminator.