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Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers?

I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.

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2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Why does John Cena set his alarm at 1:59?

So he can kick out at 2.

What are the 2 rules of success?

No1: Don't tell everything you know.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What's the difference between Ice Age 4 and Batman The Dark Knight?

The kids walked out of Ice Age 4... Alive

Why does Caitlyn Jenner feel like her kids see though her?

I guess she is trans parent now Edit: *through

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What did Russian judge say to the jury?

I better stop Stalin for time and Putin a little more effort.

What kind of watch is best for people who don't like time on their hands?

A pocket watch.

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

How is credit like cocaine?

Everyone just needs 1 more line.

Where is the best place for a 1-legged waitress to work?

IHOP

Monitor Jokes More Monitor Jokes

When The NSA is Monitoring Your Computer?

The power is on and you're connected to the internet.

Why do the cops monitor the store that sells upper-case letters for computers?

It's a shifty business.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

Why did Jon Snow wait in line at the Apple store?

For the watch.

How does an elephant get down from a tree?

He sits on a leaf and waits till autumn!

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

Why did the railroad thief get caught?

He forgot to cover his tracks! im

How do they keep track of books at the sausage library?

The Andouille Decimal System

2 Kid Jokes More 2 Kid Jokes

Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers?

I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.

Who r they 2 stop u?

Boy: My wife &amp 2 kids.