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Why did the mathematician quit his job and join NASCAR?

They told him he was good at deriving

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you tell an Irishman if you catch him urinating?

European.

How do you tell who loves you more. Your wife or your dog?

Put both of them in the trunk of your car...drive around...open the trunk and see who is happy to see you.

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

Why did the bird join he air force?

He wanted to be a parrot trooper!

What do you call a dinosaur who joins the band The Clash?

A StayGosaurus

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did all the Black people move to Detroit?

Because they heard there were no jobs there.

How many bitter Hillary Clinton supporters does it take to change a light bulb?

None, we've decided to let a man do the job.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why would I want to quit smoking?

Oh, to live longer. Why would I want to live longer

Why are you not laughing?

Cos I'm quitting today.

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Somewhere between 0 and infinity.

How do mathematicians cure constipation?

They work it out with a pencil.

Derive Jokes More Derive Jokes

Why did the mathematician get pulled over?

For drinking and deriving

Why did the calculus students get arrested?

For drinking and deriving.

Nascar Jokes More Nascar Jokes

What do you call a person that worships NASCAR?

A racist!

Why is NASCAR so popular in the southern states?

Because that's where the most racists are.