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Why is George R.R. Martin really bad at using Twitter?

There's a limit to how many characters you are allowed to waste.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do you do with 365 used condoms?

Roll them into a tire and call it a Goodyear.

Why can't Ewoks yell and scream in the house?

They have to use their Endor voices.

Allow Jokes More Allow Jokes

Why did they not allow farmers in Greece?

They got tired of all the minotaurs.

Why aren't kids under the age of 18 allowed to watch videos about duck calls without the consent of a parent?

Because they contain a lot of fowl language.

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

What do you do at a red light?

Me: "I usually respond to texts and check my Twitter."

What did I do before Twitter?

Well, there's my family and......OH MY GOD WHERE'S MY FAMILY!!

Waste Jokes More Waste Jokes

How many Capricorns does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

What is it called when a bunch of people, all under 5'2", go to a raging party?

High wasted shorts!

Character Jokes More Character Jokes

Whats the most unlikely line to read in the Bible?

The characters in this book are entirely fictional.

What do you call someone who confuses Emma Stone and Mila Kunis in a movie?

A bad judge of character.

George R.R. Martin Jokes More George R.R. Martin Jokes

Why is George R.R. Martin really bad at using Twitter?

There's a limit to how many characters you are allowed to waste.

How long does it take for George R.R. Martin to finish a Reddit post?

Answer coming Fall 2017.

Limit Jokes More Limit Jokes

What's the integral of 2x with the limits from 10 to 13?

A good time)

What's the difference between a Twitter post and a Russian Novel?

A Twitter post is limited to 140 characters