2nd Jokes

What is the difference between a man falling from a 2nd floor and a man falling from an 8th floor?

That the man that falls from the 2nd floor does: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH While the man falling from the 8th floor does: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH

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Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What do you call a 2nd grader with no friends?

A Sandyhook survivor...................im so sorry.

What is the time?

2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII!

This joke may have profanity.

How often do you floss?

Me: Daily Dentist: *Pulls fully grown centaur from between my 2nd and 3rd molars*

Why do the republicans defend the 2nd amendment so hard?

They need it to shoot themselves in the foot.

What is the definition of a minor 2nd chord?

Two flutists playing in unison.

What is that son of yours doing these days?

2nd Monster: He's at medical school. 1st Monster: Oh what's he studying 2nd Monster: Nothing they're studying him!

What is the difference between falling from the 2nd floor and the 20th floor?

The 2nd floor: (SPLAT) AAAAAaaaaaaaagggghhhhhhhhhhh...... The 20th floor: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!! (SPLAT)

Whats worse than having to break up with your Japanese girlfriend for the first time?

Her not hearing you, so you drop the bomb a 2nd time.

What was one thing Nicholas the 2nd of Russia not good at?

Czarcasm.

What do you call someone who has ancestry back to China but is a 2nd generation US citizen and is a professional bodybuilder?

Ben Ching.

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Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What do you call a kid with no arms and legs playing baseball?

2nd base.

Why does it take longer to get from 1st to 2nd base, than it does to get from 2nd to 3rd base?

Because there’s a Shortstop in between!

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Floss Jokes More Floss Jokes

Why is he bleeding "Because you stabbed him?

FAIL "Because he doesn't floss" CORRECT!

What does AF mean?

After Flossing. Now go brush your teeth and they will be clean AF. Why do you ask 10: Mom said you were lazy AF.

April Fool Jokes More April Fool Jokes

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel?

Dismay.

What monster plays the most April Fool's jokes?

Prankenstein!

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

Why shouldn't you have a conversation under a tree in the fall?

There may be leavesdropping

Why can't Chinese Barbecue?

Because the rice falls through the grill

Splat Jokes More Splat Jokes

How did the frog cross the road when a truck was coming?

SPLAT!!! He didn't.

What's the difference between falling from the 1st and 10th floor?

Falling from the 1st floor: SPLAT! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Falling from the 10th floor: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! SPLAT!

January 2nd Jokes More January 2nd Jokes

How many seconds are there in one year?

12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc

Study Jokes More Study Jokes

What did people start calling the medical school that allowed animals to study medicine?

The hippocampus.

Why aren't you studying, Billy?

Billy's Mom asked him, "Well, why aren't you studying, Billy? You have an exam tomorrow!" Billy said, "Because I've already Reddit thrice."

February 2nd March 2nd Jokes More February 2nd March 2nd Jokes

How many seconds are there in one year?

12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc

Chinese Jokes More Chinese Jokes

How Long is a Chinese man?

Its his name.

What kind of dogs are full of Chinese scientists?

Yellow labs