Brazilian Jokes

What's green and yellow and can't fly?

Brazilian soccer players.

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How amazing is Michael Phelps?

He's got like a Brazilian Medals.

How many Portuguese people can fit on a scooter?

A Brazilian

How many nuts does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A Brazilian

How many people live in South America?

A Brazilian.

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

How does a barber avoid getting hair in his food?

By giving her a Brazilian wax first!

How many South Americans are boycotting the World Cup final?

Brazilians

What is a Brazilians favorite Pokemon?

Zikachu.

How many people in Brazil shave?

A Brazilian.

How many armed men does it take to extort an Olympic athlete?

A Brazilian.

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Why did the woman refuse to pay for her Brazilian waxing?

Because it was a total rip-off.

How much does a flight to Rio cost?

A Brazilian dollars.

What are Brazilian fans called?

Brazil nuts!

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many bears does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

The bear minimum

How many Sandpeople does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

You never can tell. The Sandpeople always ride in single file to hide their numbers.

South American Jokes More South American Jokes

What do Augusto Pinochet and New Guns n Roses have in common?

They've both committed atrocities in South American stadiums.

What do South American governments and internal combustion engines have in common?

Both are measured in revolutions per minute.

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

What hairstyle does Christopher Nolan get at the barber?

A director's cut

Why did the German get their tailor and their barber mixed up?

They call their tailor Herr Dresser

Brazilian National Football Player Jokes More Brazilian National Football Player Jokes

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

How many Brazilian national football players does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows - every time they pick one up, they end up giving it away.

Galaxy Jokes More Galaxy Jokes

Why did the console peasants cross the road?

To render the building on the other side. Console Peasants :DD "Shame of galaxy"

What did one galaxy say to the Lagoon Nebula?

Whats up M8?

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

Why couldn't the BMW fit into a narrow parking stall at Target?

Because it was being driven by a woman

How do you fit five elephants into a car?

Two in the front two in the back and the other in the glove compartment!

Michael Phelps Jokes More Michael Phelps Jokes

Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?

He only Phelps himself.

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do New York McDonald's employees and people who read Ulysses have in common?

Liberal Arts Degrees.

Who burns their own city down?

The people of Ferguson.