Calculate Jokes

What mathematical operation is used to calculate the rate at which lumberjacks cut wood?

Logger-rhythms.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why couldn't Obi-Wan calculate the volume of Bespin from the ideal gas law?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes

How do they calculate global warming?

Al-gore-ythms

How do you calculate the length of rosemary?

Sprigonometry

How would you describe the typical Inuit mathematician?

Cold and calculating.

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Pack Jokes More Pack Jokes

Why do managers bring suitcases along to away games?

So that they can pack the defence!

What did the butcher say when he handed his customer an empty pack of hotdogs on Halloween?

Happy halloweenie

Sith Deal Jokes More Sith Deal Jokes

Why don't Jedi Knights use the Kelvin scale?

Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

What did Obi-Wan Kenobi say to the guy at the liquor store?

Only a Sith deals in Absolut.

Calculus Teacher Jokes More Calculus Teacher Jokes

What happens when a calculus teacher with one arm can't figure out a proof?

He gets stumped.

Why aren't there any Calculus teachers in Little Rock, Arkansas?

Because everyone there hates integration.

Sith Jokes More Sith Jokes

Where do the sith get their clothes?

Darth Mall

Where do Siths do their shopping?

At the Darth Mall

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How is Bernie going to pay for free college for everyone?

No problem! He'll just make Mexico pay for it!

How much did the pirate pay for corn?

A buck an ear!

Number Jokes More Number Jokes

Which number confuses people?

82

What did the man say who couldn't add the same number to itself?

I can't even...

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

What did the squirrel say when it saw the acorn tree cut down and taken away?

Thats nuts

Why did the Pentagon change it's name to the square?

Because they were cutting corners.

Cigarette Jokes More Cigarette Jokes

What kind of cigarettes do California kids smoke?

Yours.

What does Harry Potter say when he wants a cigarette?

Tobaccio