Crimea Jokes

What song did Russia send Ukraine for its birthday?

Crimea a river

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Why are people so sore about Russia taking the Crimea?

I mean cry me a river river right

What's the current number one song in Russia?

Crimea river

How Many Russians Does It Take To Invade Crimea?

None according to the Russians.

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What is Putin's favorite new ballot?

Crimea River

Where does he visit first?

Crimea River

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

How do tectonic plates have fun?

They meet up and crack each other up.

What did the blonde's right leg say to her left leg?

Nothing. They haven't met yet.

Eastern Europe Jokes More Eastern Europe Jokes

Where in Eastern Europe does Justin Timberlake like to kayaking?

Crimea River

What do you call a Zen master from eastern Europe who's been bugging you all day?

A Buddha Pest.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

What do you call four Mexicans who can't swim?

Cuatro cincos.

What do you call a quadruple amputee trying to swim?

Bob. Same guy laying on the floor Matt. Same guy hanging on the wall Art. Same guy in a mailbox Bill.

Protester Jokes More Protester Jokes

What happens if the protesters in Egypt win?

They advance to the finals against Tunisia.

How many protesters does it take to change a lightbulb?

TRICK QUESTION. THEY CAN'T CHANGE ANYTHING**

Putin Jokes More Putin Jokes

Why is NATO afraid of Russia?

Cause Russia's been Putin them on notice. Just thought of this.

How do you know Putin is late for Thanks Giving?

He's Russian to Turkey.

Russia Jokes More Russia Jokes

How do they cook a turkey in Russia?

They nuke it. OR In Soviet Russia, Turkey fires you!

Why is Edward still in Russia?

He's Snowden.

Complain Jokes More Complain Jokes

Why did the hipster complain about winter in July?

He wanted to do it before it was cool.

What did the lead researcher say when all of her colleagues were complaining about the experiment?

I don't care et al.