Dum Jokes

What does Pontiac stand for?

Poor, Old, Niagga, Thinks, It's, A, Cadillac. Ba dum tssss

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How does R.Kelly end a joke?

Ba dum

What do you do when a scientist dies?

You barium! ba-dum-tss

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Math Jokes More Math Jokes

Why can you never get caught with a 0 in math?

Because cot(0) doesn't exist... This joke... it burns my eyes...

Why is Math always sad?

Because it has too many problems.

Cow Culator Jokes More Cow Culator Jokes

What do bulls do math with?

A cow-culator! (Cue groans)

How do cows do math?

A cow-culator.

Require Jokes More Require Jokes

What's the difference between Swine flu, and Bird flu?

One requires 'oinkment' and the other needs 'tweetment'. i'm sorry.

What do you call a man with a shovel stuck in his head?

An ambulance because that is a serious medical emergency that requires immediate attention.

Te Jokes More Te Jokes

How did the Edward Impersonator annoy /r/jokes?

He feigned ted.

What's the difference between beekeeping and falconry?

Falconers have to be more talon-ted

Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

How do you know if someone's an expert archer?

Put an apple on your head &amp stand still he'll Tell you.

What does the 'H' in Jesus 'H' Christ stand for?

Haploid

Twitter Jokes More Twitter Jokes

What's the rule for Twitter crushes?

So far I'm in love with 800 women, 2 dudes, and a llama. Send condoms.

Why did I join Twitter?

Well I was sick of only being hated by coworkers and family so I wanted to branch out.

Hotdog Jokes More Hotdog Jokes

Why do Germans fear hotdogs with cheese?

Because for them, it is a Wurst-Kase scenario.

What do you get when you cross a hotdog and a potato?

A dictator.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do cats and people that submit jokes with the punchline "PLAGIARISM" have in common?

THEY BOTH LICK THEIR PAWS!

How many cats does it take to make a fur coat?

None! Cats can't sew!