Favourite Jokes

What is a Brit's favorite letter?

You'd think it would be "T", but it is "U". *Favourite, btw.

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How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites?

They take a gallop poll!

What's a ghosts favourite Christmas entertainment?

A phantomime!

Who are the hamburgers favourite people?

Vegetarians!

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Duck Favourite Drug Jokes More Duck Favourite Drug Jokes

What is a ducks favourite drug?

Quack

Whats a ducks favourite drug?

Quack cocaine

Nb Jokes More Nb Jokes

Where do Canadians play Basketball?

In the NB - "eh"

What's Justin Timberlake's favourite Microsoft Word alignment?

Justified. (NB Sincerely hoping that this is actually original)

Quack Cocaine Jokes More Quack Cocaine Jokes

Whats a ducks favourite drug?

Quack cocaine

What sort of drug does a duck use?

Quack cocaine

Wanna Jokes More Wanna Jokes

How do you sell a dog to someone hard of hearing?

Get really close to their ear and shout, "DO YOU WANNA BUY A DOG "

What did one train track say to the opposite track?

Wanna race?

Satisfaction Jokes More Satisfaction Jokes

What is Stephen Hawking's favourite song?

Satisfaction

What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?

Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back

Bonus Jokes More Bonus Jokes

Why can't dwarfs sing?

Because they can't reach the high notes. Bonus: how does dwarves communicate? Smalltalk.

What do you call a leper in a jacuzzi?

Stew. Bonus: what do you do if an epileptic jumps into a jacuzzi? You throw in your laundry.

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

What happens when you microwave a DVD?

You get a VHS tape.

What's a surfers least favourite household appliance?

A Microwave.

Couple Jokes More Couple Jokes

How can a room full of couples be empty?

There isn't a single person left!

What do they do with Tickle-Me-Elmo's before he leaves the factory?

Give him a couple of test-tickles.