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Japan Jokes

Why does nobody in Japan use Siri?

Because they can't take it seriousry.

Love

Love

Why are locksmiths in Japan cooler than the rest of the world's locksmiths?

Because in Japan they're rocksmiths.

Why aren't there any feminists in Japan?

Whale huntings legal

Why are there no feminists in Japan?

Because they hunt whales.

How do Mexican dogs say "hello" when in Japan?

Konnichihuahua

Why did they build a shrine to Karl Marx in Japan?

Because he was a kami!

Why is the US so much better at the accurate placement of round objects than Japan?

We had two practices in 1945

What did the Japan team say after the first half of the Women's World Cup?

I, 4-1, know we won't win.

Why hasn't Nintendo released a Mario themed basketball video game?

Because Japan isn't good at basketball.

What did Japan say when it heard the US had an atomic bomb?

Did you make that Fermi?

What food guide does a Chicagoan need in Japan?

A Ramen Manual.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

What do you call a stock market crash in Japan?

The "My Yen" Apocalypse

Who's Angry in Japan?

The director of Life of Pi.

What's the latest big thing to sweep across Japan?

The ocean.

What do Japan and Shaq have in common?

Kobe Beef

Where do pots go on vacation?

JaPAN! From my 9 year old.

Why are snakes so difficult to pick up in Japan?

Because in Japan, snakes are hebi.

What are rich people called in Japan?

Milyennaires

What did the American call Karl Marx when a shrine was dedicated to him in Japan?

A Kami.

Who knows... Maybe Japan hacked Sony?

Yeah... Lets blame Sony.

What do they call the Hunger Games in Japan?

Battle Royale with cheese

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What is the most popular band in Japan?

Fall Out Boy

What did the tsunami say to Japan?

Nothing, it waved. Happy Thursday all.

Which American city did Japan ruin?

Detroit

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Election Jokes More Election Jokes

Why couldn't Hillary rig the election like she rigged the DNC?

She deleted that email.

Why couldn't Hillary win the election?

Women only win.7 votes for every one a man wins.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What does a burning Mexican farm smell like?

Tacos. Overheard an old man telling another guy how he lost his farm in Mexico, and how the smell reminded him of tacos.

What's a Mexican midget barbers favorite restaurant?

Little Cesar's

Build Jokes More Build Jokes

Why did the man that drank 10 cups of poisoned Lipton not die?

He drank so much poison it built his immuni-tea.

What did the Mexican princess ask her sister?

Tijuana build a snowman

Whale Jokes More Whale Jokes

What is worse than a whale with a sore tooth?

Going to kiss your grandmother goodnight and she slips you the tongue.

What do you call a symphony of whales?

An orcastra

Atomic Bomb Jokes More Atomic Bomb Jokes

Why do Japanese people have slanty eyes?

Atomic bombs are realllllly bright.

What did Japan say when it heard the US had an atomic bomb?

Did you make that Fermi?

Nintendo Jokes More Nintendo Jokes

When is the earliest time of day Nintendo fans play games?

The Wii hours of the morning.

What do the Dallas Cowboys do when they win the Superbowl?

Turn off their Nintendo and go to bed.

Theme Jokes More Theme Jokes

What direction does a Walter White-themed GPS tell you to turn?

Goddamn right.

What do you call a techno-themed grocery store?

Gigi D'Agostino

Practice Jokes More Practice Jokes

What do you call couples that practice pulling out as a method of contraception?

Parents.

How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

Because they both "practice" their professions.