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June Jokes

What did Muslim sonic say on June 5?

Gotta go fasting!

Your Age Is Only Math
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Why is Halloween considered the scariest time of the year?

Most weddings happen in June.

Why does the NBA finish in June?

She likes it.

What are a school teachers 3 favorite words?

June, July, and August.

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Year Jokes More Year Jokes

Where do you see yourself in three years?

Me: Sorry, I don't have 2020 vision

What's the definition of a tree?

Something that stands still for forty years then suddenly jumps out in front of a woman driver.

July Jokes More July Jokes

Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings. Happy 4th of July!

What do they do for the 4th of July in England?

Sulk.

Calendar Jokes More Calendar Jokes

What did the Calendar say to the Wall-clock the moment it became June 1st?

I am dismayed!

What's the difference between you and a calendar?

A calendar has a future...

April 2nd Jokes More April 2nd Jokes

How many seconds are there in one year?

12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you get if you cross an insomniac, an agnostic, and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up all night wondering if there is a dog.

How do you stop your dog digging holes in your garden?

By hiding the shovel in the shed/garage

Halloween Jokes More Halloween Jokes

What is an engineer's favorite Halloween candy?

Dork chocolate

Why do witches go commando when riding around on their brooms?

Better grip. Happy Halloween

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What should you do if you get an erection on the subway?

Get off at the next stop!

How did LaKeisha's Mom finally stop her from bouncing on the trampoline in the rec room?

She put a piece of velcro on the ceiling.

February 2nd March 2nd Jokes More February 2nd March 2nd Jokes

How many seconds are there in one year?

12 of them: January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd, May 2nd, June 2nd, July 2nd, August 2nd, September 2nd, October 2nd, November 2nd, December 2nd.

How many seconds are in a year?

12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc