July Jokes

Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings. Happy 4th of July!

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What do FBI agents grill for the 4th of July?

Hillary.

What does a pirate light on the Fourth of July?

A m80.

How do you stop a dog from barking in July?

Shoot him in June.

When is a rabbi dishonest?

July

What's brown, sticky and runs down your leg?

Chocolate Ice Cream in July!

What's the difference between the United States and a yogurt?

That after 200 years, a yogurt can actually build a community. Haha, happy late 4th of July.

What does CNN call back-to-back aviation disasters?

Christmas in July

What's a holocaust denier's favorite month?

July

What do the 12th of July and the end of an essay have in common?

They're both summary!

Why did the hipster complain about winter in July?

He wanted to do it before it was cool.

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What do they do for the 4th of July in England?

Sulk.

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End Jokes More End Jokes

What's the easiest way to end a friendship?

Just asking for a friend

Why did Billy not care who he offended while posting on the internet?

Because the ends justify the memes

Moustache Jokes More Moustache Jokes

Why do women like men with moustaches?

Because they immediately see something about you they can change.

What did the facial hair say when it had to leave the party?

Sorry guys, moustache!

4th Jokes More 4th Jokes

Whose bad idea was it to text him a 4th time just in case his phone was being weird?

Tequila, I'm looking at you.

What do FBI agents grill for the 4th of July?

Hillary.

America Jokes More America Jokes

Who does Matthew McConaughey say is the most dangerous group in America?

Alt-right, alt-right, alt-right

Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings. Happy 4th of July!

United States Jokes More United States Jokes

Why isn't there any knock knock jokes about the United States?

Because freedom doesn't knock. It rings.

What's the difference between the United States and some yoghurt?

After 200 years, the Yoghurt develops a culture.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What does a homeless man gets for Christmas?

A cold.

What kind of cards do donkeys send out near Christmas?

Mule-tide greetings.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the worst thing about being a transgender?

Having the women inside of you telling you what to do.

How do you cure a mute coworker?

Tell them a secret

Freedom Ring Jokes More Freedom Ring Jokes

Why Can't America tell knock knock jokes?

Cause' freedom RINGS!

Why are there no knock-knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings. Happy 4th of July!