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Kidnap Jokes

What's it called when you kidnap a ghost?

A Polter-Heist

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What do you call a computer programmer that likes to kidnap children?

A PDFile.

What do you call a duck being kidnapped?

An abduction. I'll quietly leave through this conveniently placed door.

Why did parking tickets increase after Persephone was kidnapped?

Demeter wasn't working.

What happend to the guys who kidnapped Batman?

They got Bale.

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Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What did the U.S. airdrop to the children of Afghanistan?

Bombs

What did the child with no arms get for Christmas?

Gloves. Just kidding, he hasn't opened it yet.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What's the difference between a goldfish and a mountain goat?

Goldfish like to muck around the fountain.

What kind of tree likes a high five?

A palm tree

1200 Jokes More 1200 Jokes

What do you call a Mexican wrestler that only fights during his 12:00 break?

A lunchador.

Why would 12:00 make the best cop?

Hands up

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

What did tie say to the hat?

You go on ahead, I'll hang around.

Boko Haram Jokes More Boko Haram Jokes

What does the Pope Jean-Paul 2 and the little girl kidnapped by Boko Haram have in common?

The pope died a virgin

What's the difference between a Boko Haram training camp and a Nigerian refugee camp?

I don't know, I just fly the fighter jet.

Plumber Jokes More Plumber Jokes

What did one plumber say to the other plumber?

Pipe down.

How do you tell which plumber went home for lunch?

He's the one with the clean finger.

Parent Jokes More Parent Jokes

Why couldn't little Johnny get the toy he saw on TV?

His parents weren't 18 or older.

Why parents don't allow their children to listen to M. Jackson songs?

Because they are very touching

Baghdad Jokes More Baghdad Jokes

What do you call a dad that works at a grocery store?

Baghdad

What do you call a spider from Baghdad?

An Iraqnid.