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Leader Jokes

What's the worst kind of incompetent?

Leader.

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What do the leaders of ISIS drink after a victory?

Bombay.

What do you call an IS-leader on a motorcycle?

Abu Bikr

What did the disgruntled alien customer say to the store clerk?

Take me to your leader!

What's the leader of North Korea's wife wear when she's not in the mood?

A Kimono

What is a monster's favourite game?

Swallow the leader.

What's a sharks favorite game?

Swallow the leader. *This joke has been brought to you by my 8 year old's math homework.*

Why is it easier to pick a prime minister than any other leader?

Because there's only 2 factors involved.

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Russian Leader Jokes More Russian Leader Jokes

What do you get when you place a Russian leader on a cracker?

Putin on the Ritz.

Which Russian leader is always farting?

Putin

Pope Jokes More Pope Jokes

What happens when a pope dies?

Another pops up.

What did the pope say to Aretha Franklin?

I said play pope music not pop music.

Volume Jokes More Volume Jokes

What is the volume of pizza?

Pizza of course! If z = radius of the pizza and a = the height then * radius2 * height = Pi * z * z * a = Pizza.

What is the volume of a pizza of thickness A and radius Z?

PI Z Z A

Car Door Jokes More Car Door Jokes

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?

A chauffeur.

How does a blonde turn the lights on in the morning?

She opens the car door.

7 Jokes More 7 Jokes

Why is the new version called Windows 10?

Because 7 ate 9.

Why did Microsoft skip a number when naming their new operating system?

Because 7 ate 9.

Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What should you do if you find a witch in your bed?

Run!

Where is Jennifer's husband?

Jennifer is 21 years older than her son Douglas. 6 years from now, Jennifer will be 5 times as old as Douglas. Question: Where is Jennifer's husband? Solution: J=D+21 J+6=5(D+6) According to my math, Douglas has 3/4 years, which means -9 months. Pregnancy lasts for nine months, so Jennifer's husband is in the bed with her right now. Sauce:

Rush Jokes More Rush Jokes

Why are you always rushing out of here after work?

You're single with no kids." Me: " Exactly."

Why was Stalin a Bad leader?

Because he was staling a country that was rushing..(Russia) This joke was bad. Im going to bed now.

Oppose Jokes More Oppose Jokes

Why are families only allowed 1 child in China?

The government is opposed to euthanasia.

How do you tell if someone is opposed to GMOs?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.