Length Jokes

What did the tailor say to his customer after shortening the length of his pants?

A-hem!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

Why did the bad demon burn after finding the length it took to rise diagonally from hell?

Cos' sin tans

How do you calculate the length of rosemary?

Sprigonometry

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Revenge Jokes More Revenge Jokes

How does Snoop Dogg get revenge?

Faux pho fo' foe. Served cold of course.

What does a bird say when it wants revenge?

Toucan play at that game!

Hem Jokes More Hem Jokes

What did the tailor say to his customer after shortening the length of his pants?

A-hem!

Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms and not legs laying on a porch?

Matt

Why did Sally fall of the swingset?

She had no arms. BONUS JOKE: Knock Knock. Who's there Not Sally.

Exaggerate Jokes More Exaggerate Jokes

What is literally the most important fact you'll ever learn, that will totally blow your mind?

That people exaggerate.

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

How do you fit an elephant in the subway?

You take the letter "S" out of "sub", and the letter "F" out of "way".

How would you order a Subway footlong in metric countries where they don't have feet?

By crawling to the counter " GET OUT

Hell Jokes More Hell Jokes

Why is heaven a paradise for the common man?

Because all the politicians are in hell.

Why do people ask "what the hell were you thinking"?

Obviously, I was thinking I was gonna get away with it and not have to explain it

Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

When is an aardvark jumpy?

When he's got ants in his pants!

What's the sharpest thing in the word?

A fart. It goes right through your pants and doesn't leave a hole.

Revenant Jokes More Revenant Jokes

Why didn't the bear from the revenant win the Oscar?

Because it would've torn Leo up to receive another Oscar loss

What is the Revenant about?

The unbearable lengths one man will go to get his revenge and win an Oscar.