Long Day Jokes

How does Stephen Hawking refresh after a long day?

F5.

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What drink does a cannibal have after a long day?

A handshake!

Where did the meteorologist stop for a drink on the way home from a long day in the studio?

The nearest ISOBAR!!

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France Jokes More France Jokes

Why did Blitzkrieg work so well in France?

Because lightning always follows the path of least resistance

Why there are so many avenues in France?

Because German soldiers like to march in the shade

Cannibal Jokes More Cannibal Jokes

What do you give a cannibal late for Sunday lunch?

The cold shoulder

Why was the cannibal fined by the judge?

He was caught poaching.

Plunger Jokes More Plunger Jokes

What is the worse thing you can do to a blind man?

Leave the plunger in the toilet!

What is the worst thing anyone can do to a blind man?

Leave a plunger in the toilet!

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many performance artists does it take to change a lightbulb?

I don't know, I left early.

How many evolutionists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one but it takes eight million years.

Bride Jokes More Bride Jokes

Why are wedding in Wales so inexpensive?

The brides are already dressed in white.

Why are almost all brides dresses white?

So the dishwasher matches the washing machine

Hellen Keller Jokes More Hellen Keller Jokes

What is Hellen Keller's favorite color?

Corduroy.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away?

You would run away too if your name was MUWWAAAUY

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why are you being so salty?

Her response - with a flat, even look: "I've been well seasoned." I lost it

How did the Italians lose WWII?

They ordered ziti instead of shells.

5 Year Old Jokes More 5 Year Old Jokes

Why does tigger smell?

Becuase he hangs around with pooh! Had to share my 5 year olds joke..

What do the Scottish people call iPhone?

An AYE-Phone. (Joke brought to you by a 5 year old)