Mustard Jokes

What is yellow and rolls down a hill?

Mustard in a rollerskate

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Coffee Mug

Why is ketchup married to mustard?

Cause ketchup accidentally broke the condiment.

What do you call mustard that's not very hot?

Air condijoned.

Why did the drill instructor squirt condiments on his trainees in the morning?

That's how he mustard the troops.

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

It's must-up..

What did the bun say to the hot dog?

I relish the fact that you've mustard the will to ketchup to me!

What did the guy who liked mustard say when he opened his fridge and saw no mustard?

You mustard be joking!

What do you give a dog with a fever?

Mustard. (It's good for a hot dog.)

What do you call a Mustard that keeps remembering things that haven't happened yet?

Dijon-vu mustard... (Sorry)

What do you call a singing bottle of mustard?

Celine Dijon

What does Colonel Mustard's Mexican maid call him?

Phonetically-ish)* Mis'ser Dijon.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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Coffee Mug

Why is the whole battalion yellow and slimy?

Me: I mustard the troops. General: ... Me: Just as you told me to, sir.

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Hot Dog Jokes More Hot Dog Jokes

Why are hot dogs the best dogs?

Because they feed the hand that bites them.

What do you call a woman who rents out hot dogs?

Lisa Frank

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency?

So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke.

Why is mustard good to have in case of an emergency?

It's always prepared.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

Why don't I have a boyfriend?

God: I sent you one, you dumped him for putting ketchup on his steak. Me: Ah. That's right. Gross.

What do you tell a slow tomato?

What Ketchup

Mustard Gas Pepper Spray Jokes More Mustard Gas Pepper Spray Jokes

What do you call a soldier who's survived mustard gas and pepper spray?

A seasoned veteran.

What do you call a soldier who survives Mustard gas and pepper spray?

A seasoned veteran.

Soldier Jokes More Soldier Jokes

What's the scariest 3 letter acronym for a soldier in Afghanistan with a 15 year old daughter at home?

IUD

How do you drive this thing?

Two soldiers are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "GLUGGLUGBLUGBWOOABB"

Relish Jokes More Relish Jokes

What did the burger do when he ate his enemy the hotdog?

He relished it

How does the enthusiastic chef serve his burgers?

With relish

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What part does Woody Harrelson want to be remembered for most?

Harrelson's woodie.

How do narcissists remember everything?

They have a photogenic memory.

Star Jokes More Star Jokes

What's the difference between a star and America?

The star has a bright future.

What happened after the King of All Cosmos destroyed the stars in a drunken rage?

Divine intervention. edit: Oh.