Emergency Jokes

What does an helicopter and pants have in common?

They both moust go down in emergency.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What's your emergency?

Boy: Hello? I need your help! 911: Alright, What is it? Boy: Two girls are fighting over me! 911: So what's your emergency? Boy: The ugly one is winning.

Whats ur emergency?

OMG my neighbours cat is stuck on the roof-" 911: Ma'am, this is an emergency only service- "-of my sons mouth."

Why is mustard good to have in case of an emergency?

It's always prepared.

What's ur emergency?

Goldfish: I forgot Goldfish 911: Forgot what Goldfish: WHO IS THIS Goldfish 911: I DON'T KNOW

When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?

When the chips are down!

What do chefs do when they are cooking in an emergency?

They take drastic measures.

Which positions does a violist use?

First third and emergency.

What's the emergency?

How long before the rice is ready

Why are women and children evacuated first in an emergency?

So the men can think of a solution in silence.

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Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What about the kids?

He asked. I said, "they're still together."

What are we going to do when we see it?

She asks. "We'll cross that bridge when we get there."

Police Officer Jokes More Police Officer Jokes

How do you describe a hierarchy of police officers with only one word?

Police police police police police police police police police police police.

Why do police officers sleep with two rocks near their bed?

With one he turns off the light, With the other he checks if the window is closed

Swat Team Jokes More Swat Team Jokes

What do the cops do when they get a fly infestation?

Call in the swat team!

Who do you call when theres a fly in your house?

The SWAT team

Roof Jokes More Roof Jokes

What is a dog's favorite thing about living in a house?

Roofs.

What did the Mexican say when his roof fell on him?

Get off me Holmes!

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What is the size of women in Italy?

Itali-cized.

What do you get if you cross a woman with a whale?

Your research funding suspended and a severe reprimand from the ethics committee.

Leap Jokes More Leap Jokes

Trench Coat Jokes More Trench Coat Jokes

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What kind of car do ghosts drive?

BOOgatti!

What kind of car did Jesus drive?

A manual.