Postman Jokes

What do you call a person who delivers horribly?

A re-postman. Or a re-post person if you feel triggered.

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Why didn't the internit get any e-mail?

Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.

Why do postmen carry letters?

Because the letters can't go anywhere by themselves.

What did the band consisting only of postmen call itself?

Vanmailen.

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

Why do dogs turn around three times before lying down?

One good turn deserves another.

What is she?

Me: A dog. Duh. Neighbor...

Trigger Jokes More Trigger Jokes

What's the difference between a terrorist and a feminist?

The terrorist needs a trigger to blow things up.

What triggers feminists?

Genders

Deliver Jokes More Deliver Jokes

What do the post office and the San Francisco 49ers have in common?

They don't deliver on Sunday

How many calls do I get?

Cop: one me: What do you think is more likely a lawyer delivering pizza or a dominos providing legal counsel

Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

What did Kellyanne Conway say about the leaked e-mails?

They're just alternate fax.

How do you mail an egg?

In a henvelope!

Retire Jokes More Retire Jokes

How do magicians retire?

They seem to just disappear.

What do you call a cop who doesn't shoot innocent black people?

1. Acquitted 2. Fired, retired or expired

King Kong Jokes More King Kong Jokes

What do you get if King Kong sits on your best friend?

A flat mate.

What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen?

Just don't monkey with him.

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why do Klingons feel very little pain?

They produce a lot of endworfins.

What do you call the feeling of being a tortured insect?

Antagony

Pat Jokes More Pat Jokes

What's the difference between Here and There?

When you're right the whole room shouts "Here, here!" But when you're wrong one person pats you on the back and says "There, there."

What do you get if you walk under a cow?

A pat on the head.