Profession Jokes

Which profession has the worst sense of humour?

Well, chiropodists like jokes. But opticians like them.

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How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

Because they both "practice" their professions.

What was the first profession to go all digital?

Proctology.

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

What do you call it when someone relies on sleep studies for a profession?

A rem job

What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Driver

What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock?

Politics

What profession was once highly respected, but is now a complete joke?

Nigerian Prince Thanks r/askreddit for the idea

Why would you name your human child Hunter?

Hunter is a profession. That's like naming your kid Dentist.

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Optician Jokes More Optician Jokes

Why did the PHP programmer go to the optician?

Because he didn't C#

Which profession has the worst sense of humour?

Well, chiropodists like jokes. But opticians like them.

Saudi Arabia Jokes More Saudi Arabia Jokes

Who is the most hated actor in Saudi Arabia?

Shia Labeouf

Why is Pokemon Go Banned in Saudi Arabia?

Because not all Pokemon know selfdestruct.

King Jokes More King Jokes

What's a Londoner's favorite seafood?

King's Crustacean.

Why didn't anyone react when the king farted?

Because it was a noble gas

Note Jokes More Note Jokes

Why was Amazon angry after their conference with Samsung?

After taking Notes, they realized their was no way they could sell the Fire.

What do you call a deer without eyes?

No-eye deer! Note: we are from Hicksville, USA. This May not make sense without the Midwestern accent.

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the opposite of Dominoes?

Domi does not know....

How do you know that one of them is a Marine?

Don't worry he'll let you know

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why did you arrest that doctor?

Officer: He was trying to take someone's pulse.

What do you call a doctor who is always on a phone?

An oncologist

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many people on a beach does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Depends on how many survivors there are. too soon.

How many Apple employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

I don't know, because they charge you $500 for the iLightbulb.

Country Jokes More Country Jokes

Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

Which country do doctors hate?

Any