Profession Jokes

Which profession has the worst sense of humour?

Well, chiropodists like jokes. But opticians like them.

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How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

Because they both "practice" their professions.

What was the first profession to go all digital?

Proctology.

What's one profession that doctors, lawyers, even the king of Saudi Arabia and the presidents of the USSR and US bow their heads to?

Barbers.

What do you call it when someone relies on sleep studies for a profession?

A rem job

What profession does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Driver

What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock?

Politics

What profession was once highly respected, but is now a complete joke?

Nigerian Prince Thanks r/askreddit for the idea

Why would you name your human child Hunter?

Hunter is a profession. That's like naming your kid Dentist.

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Similarity Jokes More Similarity Jokes

What's the similarity between Divorce and tornados in the Midwest?

Someone's losing their trailer

Whats the similarity between Monkey in the Middle and Football?

Both of the groups that are concered about the health of someone playing both begin with the letter P.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What's the difference between one polar bear and 10 polar bears?

9 polar bears (joke on a mug at work. lame, ik)

How did it work?

We haven't spoken for five years".

Politic Jokes More Politic Jokes

What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock?

Politics

What's the difference between organized crime and politics?

One's organized.

Humour Jokes More Humour Jokes

How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb?

One. They're efficient and don't have humour.

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

One. We are efficient and don't like humour.

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

Who can shave 25 times in one day, and still have a beard?

A barber!

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What's the easiest way to end a friendship?

Just asking for a friend

What are some good fruit jokes?

My friend is doing a video project for school and needs fruit jokes.

Idea Jokes More Idea Jokes

What kind of ideas do blind people get?

Brailleant ones. Sauce: Am blind.

How about baked chocolate cake?

Nah" "Yummy choccy bake " "No" Guy who named the orange: I have an idea...

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What's the difference between America and Saudi Arabia?

You don't need a computer to play minesweeper in Saudi Arabia. (I'm not sorry)

Whats the difference between a 90s woman and a - computer?

A 90s woman won't accept a three-and-a-half-inch floppy.