Country Jokes

What country are the majority of dress pants made?

Khakistan!

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Which country will be the first to change to all electric vehicles?

Madagascar

How do you know that you're a peaceful country?

When you realize that you can't spell country without UN.

Which country has many spaces to put your car in?

Park-istan!

What is a Mexican's favorite Olympic event?

Cross country

Which country do doctors hate?

Any

What country is next to USA?

USB.

What language do pigs speak?

Depends on which country they're from.

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

What do you call someone in the army that knows the capital of every country on earth?

General Knowledge

Why was Stalin a Bad leader?

Because he was staling a country that was rushing..(Russia) This joke was bad. Im going to bed now.

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Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

What happens when everyone in the country takes a pee at the same time?

Urine-nation!

Why is USA so gloomy?

Because only two parties exist for the whole country

What country has many sugar?

Sweetzerland

What country always follows Zimbabwe?

Zimbab-Bee!

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

What country are you most likely to get a disease?

GERMany.

What do you call a sick bird of prey that enters the country without permission?

An ill-eagle

What country has the most internet crimes?

E-gypt

What country has the most people?

Brazil... They've got Brazillions

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Who's Becky, Stan?

She's just a country!

What country does fried fish swim in?

Greece! (courtesy of my ten year old)

What country is the most fragile?

China!

What country uses the most foul language?

Turkey

What is a Mexican's favorite sport event?

Cross country

What country can't be hacked?

Madagascar, because all their ports are closed.

What country is ill?

Germany.

What's a Mexican's favourite sport?

Cross country

Why did the Polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Which country has the most crying people per km?

The Soviet Onion

What country has the strictest dress code?

Thai-land.

Which country has the nicest children?

Germany. German children are kinder.

What country are you from?

I asked. "Iraq" he said. "How did you escape " I asked. IRAN

Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense?

So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.

What country do I live?

Iran

What country has the highest concentration of pool players?

Irack.

What's a Mexicans favorite game?

Cross country.

What would call it if all the cars in the country were pink?

A pink carnation.

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons?

Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train!

What's a European immigrant's favorite high school sport?

Cross country

What's the biggest type of tree?

A Country.

Where is the CAPITAL of out COUNTRY?

Student -"in Swiss Banks"..

What country do cows love to visit?

Moo Zealand!

What country do all cats wish to get their food from?

Viet NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

What do you call a country ruled by oppressive Vikings?

Norse Korea

How many countries border Germany?

Nein!

How did Canada name their country?

They picked random letters from a hat. C, eh N, eh D, eh

What country most despises cars that run on gasoline?

Mad-at-gas-cars!

Why hasn't Africa ever won Olympic gold in basketball?

Because Africa isn't a country.

What country has 6 faces, and 8 points?

Cuba

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Majority Jokes More Majority Jokes

What country are the majority of dress pants made?

Khakistan!

What's funny about majorities?

Most things.

President Jokes More President Jokes

Why isn't the Vice President running for President this year?

Cuz he's Biden his time.

Who fills in for the president of Russia when he's on leave?

Deputin

Nordic Country Jokes More Nordic Country Jokes

Why are the nordic countries the best countries to live in?

Their flags are big plusses.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between fishing and dating?

In one you don't want to jerk the hook, but in the other you don't want to hook the jerk.

What's the difference between a skeptic and a conspiracy theorist?

You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

Bump Jokes More Bump Jokes

What's the difference between falling 2 ft and 200 ft?

200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump 2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa (Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)

What was the Italian hot tub that was so small it's occupants always bumped into each other called?

Ja-scusi.

Country Music Jokes More Country Music Jokes

What do you get when you play country music backwards?

You get your job back, you get your wife back and you get your tractor back.

What happens if you sing country music backwards?

You get your job and your wife back.

Newton Jokes More Newton Jokes

What do you call a baby panther?

A Newton.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What did the man say when he couldn't get the gun to fire?

Looks like I'm gonna have to read the trouble shooting section of the manual.

What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit?

The first herd shot round the world!