Country Jokes

Why do baby boomers like fracking so much?

Because figuratively breaking the country apart isn't enough.

March Madness Sale

Birthday State of Mind

$5.99

What country are the majority of dress pants made?

Khakistan!

Why are we seeing the creepy clowns all over the country?

Being in many states and seen on all types of media is how they run for president.

Which country will be the first to change to all electric vehicles?

Madagascar

How do you know that you're a peaceful country?

When you realize that you can't spell country without UN.

Which country has a drug-addicted king?

Hyrule.

How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs?

Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce.

Which country has many spaces to put your car in?

Park-istan!

What's Mexico's national sport?

Cross country

Which country do doctors hate?

Any

What country makes the most milk?

Nepal

March Madness Sale

I Love Pizza & You

$5.99

Why is there so much "twang" in Country music?

It is the sound a guitar makes after six or seven generations of inbreeding.

What do your mom and Poland have in common?

A lot of countries have been inside her.

What country is next to USA?

USB.

What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and a run in the forest?

Ones a pant in the country the others a...

What language do pigs speak?

Depends on which country they're from.

What do you call a country that doesn't use credit cards?

A Czech Republic

What do you call a country ruled by dank memes?

Kappatalism

What do you call someone in the army that knows the capital of every country on earth?

General Knowledge

Where do black person go to travel cross-country?

The Newport (My first joke, sorry if bad 8)

Why was Stalin a Bad leader?

Because he was staling a country that was rushing..(Russia) This joke was bad. Im going to bed now.

March Madness Sale

We've Got This Love Thing Down

$5.99

Why do clouds make good Kings?

Because they have rain over every country in the world.

What happens when everyone in the country takes a pee at the same time?

Urine-nation!

Why is USA so gloomy?

Because only two parties exist for the whole country

What country has many sugar?

Sweetzerland

What country always follows Zimbabwe?

Zimbab-Bee!

Which country has the most number of bacteria, viruses, fungus and other micro-organisms?

GerMany

What country are you most likely to get a disease?

GERMany.

What do you call a sick bird of prey that enters the country without permission?

An ill-eagle

What country has the most internet crimes?

E-gypt

What country has the most people?

Brazil... They've got Brazillions

March Madness Sale

Couple's Daily Question Mug

$14.99 $19.99

Who's Becky, Stan?

She's just a country!

What country does fried fish swim in?

Greece! (courtesy of my ten year old)

What country is the most fragile?

China!

What country uses the most foul language?

Turkey

What is a Mexican's favorite sport event?

Cross country

Why don't many Greek men move to other countries?

They don't want to leave their brothers behind

What does the new socialist leader of France mean for the country, Europe, and the world?

Nationalized wine.. Sounds like the right wing will have some whine too.

What country can't be hacked?

Madagascar, because all their ports are closed.

How's Terry Fox like Jack Layton?

They both tried to run a country and died before finishing.

What do you call a country of grizzlies that is always stoned?

A hibearnation.

What country is ill?

Germany.

What's a Mexican's favourite sport?

Cross country

Why did the Polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Which country has the most crying people per km?

The Soviet Onion

Why did Mexico reduce the number of days an American tourist can stay in their country from 180 days to 90 days?

Because after 90 days in Mexico, even they try to enter the US illegally.

What are the people from the country Lesbia called?

Lesbians

What country has the strictest dress code?

Thai-land.

Which country has the nicest children?

Germany. German children are kinder.

Why do they call them "country bumpkins"?

Because in the country, you bump your kin!

What country are you from?

I asked. "Iraq" he said. "How did you escape " I asked. IRAN

Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense?

So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.

What country has the highest concentration of pool players?

Irack.

What's a Mexicans favorite game?

Cross country.

What's the difference between Ellen Pao and Kim Jong Un?

Kim Jong Un has control over his country.

Why did the gynecologist take a vacation out of the country?

To study abroad.

What would call it if all the cars in the country were pink?

A pink carnation.

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons?

Because they didn't want to wait 40 years for a train!

Why did the Polish government have to finally ban water-polo throughout the country?

Too many horses were drowning.

What's a European immigrant's favorite high school sport?

Cross country

Which candidate will most improve our country?

2016 election: Which candidate is least likely to start The Purge

What's the biggest type of tree?

A Country.

Who's about to run this country?

Yea that

Where is the CAPITAL of out COUNTRY?

Student -"in Swiss Banks"..

What country do cows love to visit?

Moo Zealand!

What country do all cats wish to get their food from?

Viet NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

What do you call a country ruled by oppressive Vikings?

Norse Korea

How many countries border Germany?

Nein!

How did Canada name their country?

They picked random letters from a hat. C, eh N, eh D, eh

What country most despises cars that run on gasoline?

Mad-at-gas-cars!

Why hasn't Africa ever won Olympic gold in basketball?

Because Africa isn't a country.

What country has 6 faces, and 8 points?

Cuba

You might also enjoy:

Majority Jokes More Majority Jokes

What are the three types of men?

The handsome the caring and the majority.

What's funny about majorities?

Most things.

Un Jokes More Un Jokes

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs for breakfast?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Why do the French make omelettes with only one egg?

Because in France one egg is un oeuf.

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

What word is always spelled wrong?

Wrong

How do you spell candy with two letters?

C and Y

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

Where's the best place to go on the first date?

All the way

What causes German Earthquakes?

Teutonic Plates. I'm sorry I'll find my own way out

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you combine TNT with a hard drive?

It gets blown to

What happened when the elephant sat on the car?

Everyone knows a Mercedes Bends!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an spam and a personal attack?

They aren'tt tolerated on thsi subredit

What is the difference between the abominable snowman and the abominable snowwoman?

Two abominable snowballs

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

How are you able to stay in bed all morning without getting up to pee?

He replied......It's hard

Why can't you hear Michelle Pfeiffer use the restroom?

Because her pee is silent.

Mexican Favorite Sport Jokes More Mexican Favorite Sport Jokes

What's a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross Country.

What is a Mexican's favorite sport?

It used to be cross country but now it's rock climbing.