Sea Lion Jokes

How do seals keep their coats so smooth?

They use a sea lion.

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How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

Who is a Sea Lion's favorite composer?

Orff Orff Orff Orff!

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An electron

What is the difference between a portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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Portuguese Jokes More Portuguese Jokes

What do laws and virgins have in common?

They're both there to be violated. (The sad part is that a Portuguese Taxi Driver actually said that seriously in a protest against Uber)

What is the difference between a portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

Seal Jokes More Seal Jokes

How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

What's the difference between a seal and a sealion?

An electron

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Why should you never ask people with Down Syndrome to use a printer?

They always make an extra copy

What do mathematicians use to get fast delivery?

Amazon'

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

What did the Italian say when 6 curses were removed from him?

Hexagon.

How do you disappoint a pack of redditors?

Removed

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

Whats the best thing about duct tape?

It turns NO! NO! NO! into MMM MMM MMM

What are we going to do?

The other replied "Quick turn the car into a side street."

Sea Jokes More Sea Jokes

Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay?

Because if they did they would be Bagels

What is the most important thing for a hungry shark?

A-fish-in-sea.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian?

A Ritz is a snack cracker and a lesbian is a crack snacker

What is the difference... What is the difference between unlawful and illegal?

One is against the law and the other is a sick bird.

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

How does Samsung know its most loyal customers?

They check with the burn ward. (I'll get my coat)