Sea Lion Jokes

How do seals keep their coats so smooth?

They use a sea lion.

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How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

Who is a Sea Lion's favorite composer?

Orff Orff Orff Orff!

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An electron

What is the difference between a Portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

Why is Kim Jong Un a terrible leader?

Removed

How many TSA agents does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. TSA agents only know how to remove clothes putting them on is different matter completely.

Electron Jokes More Electron Jokes

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

How many electrons does a negatively charged oxygen atom have?

Nion

Ion Jokes More Ion Jokes

How does a physicist exercise?

By pumping ion!

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What lives in the sea and preys on mermaids?

Jack The Kipper.

Which is the oldest animal?

Zebra. Coz they are still living in black and white.

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

What does a painter do when he gets cold?

Puts on another coat.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What was the Preacher turned Drill Seargent's favorite command?

Present Alms!

What does a Necrophiliac have when he is turned on?

Mourning Wood

Smell Jokes More Smell Jokes

What do you call a man who can smell the future?

Nostrildamus

What's green, slimy and smells like bacon?

Kermit the frogs finger (shoutout to Hesher)

Seal Jokes More Seal Jokes

Why is the North Pole of a magnet red?

Because they don't have seals on the South Pole Takes a while to get, but it's worth it in the end.

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!