Sea Lion Jokes

How do seals keep their coats so smooth?

They use a sea lion.

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How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

Who is a Sea Lion's favorite composer?

Orff Orff Orff Orff!

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An electron

What is the difference between a Portuguese woman and a sea lion?

One of them has shiny bodyhair and smells like cod, the other one is a mammal that lives in the sea.

What's the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

An ion!

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Cod Jokes More Cod Jokes

What did the atheist fisherman say when asked about his catch?

There is no cod

Why is CoD: Infinite Warfare set in space?

Because no one on earth wants to buy it.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What's that coffee drink with icecream?

I used to know it, but... Affogato.

Why didn't they use Black Phosphorous?

It doesn't work.

Sea Jokes More Sea Jokes

What's a Pirate's favorite letter?

Rrrrrrrr? You think it be R but it be sea

Why did the chicken of the sea cross the road?

Because a tuna can!

Coat Jokes More Coat Jokes

What kind of flour is independent?

Self-Raising flour.. I'll get my coat.

What did the thief say when he saw the man leave his coat behind?

Let's jack it.

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What do you call a money lender who lives in the ocean?

A loan shark!

What's a VCR?

My 10yo instantly making me feel like the oldest person who has ever lived. I need calcium chews for my brittle bones.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's green then turns red really quickly?

A frog in a blender

Where is the water main?

So I turned on the tap & said, "Right here, main."

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a shopping cart and a radical feminist?

A shopping cart will, on occasion, exhibit a mind of it's own

Whats the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?

The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

What did the verb say when the words have, has, and had were removed from the English language?

"Nobody's perfect!"

Why did the reddit mod cross the road?

Removed