Victoria Jokes

Why does no one trust victoria?

Because victoria has secrets.

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What did Victoria say to Vancouver?

I'll BC-ing you later.

What did Victoria say to the tailor?

I'm a Taylor too.

Where is Victoria working now?

In the kitchen.

Why is history called His story?

Because it's written by the Victors, not the Victorias.

What will reddit never know?

Victoria's Secret...

Why did Victoria lose her job?

We don't know, it's Victoria's secret.

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Trip Jokes More Trip Jokes

What do you get when you chop up a fruit and mix it with vegetables?

I don't know but it was hard as hell stealing thier wheelchairs with pieces of Richard Simmons tripping me up.

How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?

Planet

Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes More Arnold Schwarzenegger Jokes

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger do after he retired?

He became an ex-Terminator!

What does Arnold Schwarzenegger say when Christmas is over?

OC (please use your Ahnold voice) Hasta la vista, Baby....Jesus.

Kitchen Jokes More Kitchen Jokes

Why did the pig walk into the kitchen?

Because he felt like bacon.

Why did the pig go into the kitchen?

Because he felt like BACON!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why does the Easter Bunny hide eggs?

Because, he doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing a chicken.

When the bartender asks you what's in a Ryan Lochte?

Just say "I don't know, make something up"

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why was the fruit farmer losing money?

He couldn't grow a pear

Where should you go if you lost a corner?

To the Eagles, they can get corner-backs.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What did the windmill say to the windmill engineer?

I'm a big fan of your work

What do you call Iron Man and silver surfer when they work together?

Alloys.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many buddhists does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to change it, one to not-change it and one to both change-and not-change it.

How many surrealist painters does it take to change a lightbulb?

Fish. I got this from bash.org a long time ago, but I can't find the original post, so have this

Zebra Jokes More Zebra Jokes

Which is the oldest animal?

Zebra. Coz they are still living in black and white.

What do you call a horse that's a criminal?

A Zebra.