Winnie Jokes

How does Winnie the Pooh open his honey pot?

With his bear hands. Thank the Chive for that one.

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Who is a Chinese feminist's least favorite Winnie the Pooh character?

Trigger.

What do Winnie the Pooh and Ivan the Terrible have in common?

The same middle name. (Shamelessly stolen from Cortana.)

Why did the boy peek down the toilet bowl?

He was trying to find Winnie the Pooh.

What 2 things do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common?

They both ate honey and they both have the same middle name.

What do Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have in common?

The same middle name.

What's the name of West Virginia's version of Winnie the Pooh?

Gummy Bear

What do Winnie the Pooh and Attila the Hun have in common?

The same middle name.

What do you call the things on the end of Winnie the Pooh's feet?

Putos (Ask your Mexican friend)

What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?

Winnie the Pooh!

What do you call The Bear who loves philosophy?

Winnie the Philosopooh

$Your Age Is Only Math$

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What do John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have in common?

They have the same middle name!

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Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

What do you call an emo a capella group?

Self Harmony Edit: #10 on /r/all! And thanks for the gold kind stranger!

What did the doctor say to the speeding commuter?

Thank you for your patients.

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?

Annette!

Why is the letter N the most powerful letter?

Because it is in the middle of TNT.

Terrible Jokes More Terrible Jokes

What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

What do Winnie the Pooh and Ivan the Terrible have in common?

The same middle name. (Shamelessly stolen from Cortana.)

Trigger Jokes More Trigger Jokes

What's the difference between a feminist and a bomb vest?

The bomb vest actually does something when triggered.

What's the best thing about banging 28 year olds?

There's 20 of them. don't get triggered, just a joke! Paedophilia is not funny

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why dad?

He asks. Because my arm is getting tired

When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother what will I be. Will I be pretty, will I be rich?

Here's what she said to me: GO TO SLEEP.

Jack Ripper Jokes More Jack Ripper Jokes

What's Tim Cook's new nickname?

Jack the Ripper

Why does nobody ever talk about Jack the Ripper's sleazier French cousin?

Jock the stripper.

Jack Jokes More Jack Jokes

What do Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have in common?

The same middle name.

What does a toddler get drunk off of?

Jack Danimals!

Bear Hand Jokes More Bear Hand Jokes

How does Winnie the Pooh open his honey pot?

With his bear hands. Thank the Chive for that one.

How does a grizzly catch fish?

With his bear hands!