What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute?

My cat would be dead before I got 50

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Like Jokes More Like Jokes

How does Dracula like to have his food served?

In bite-sized pieces.

Why did God put the ring on Saturn?

Because he liked it.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar?

A sourpuss!

What kinds of jokes do cats play on each other?

Purranks.

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What's not 50% off today?

Health insurance

What has 200 legs 50 noses and is very loud?

A herd of stampeding aardvarks!

Minute Jokes More Minute Jokes

What was the most successful love story in Game of Thrones?

Shireen. She was only on Tinder for a couple of minutes.

How long is the flight?

A Polish man calls up an airline. "How long is the flight from Chicago to Warsaw?" "One minute..." "Thank you."

Sneeze Jokes More Sneeze Jokes

What do you call a football fan with a cold?

A sneezing ticket holder.

Why do sharks only swim in salt water?

Got this is a Cracker Jack box) Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

500 Jokes More 500 Jokes

What do you call it when a waiter at an internet cafe gets your order wrong?

500 Internal Server Error

How did the babysitter lose 500 kids and keep her job?

She swallowed

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What do you get when you kiss a canary?

Chirpes. It can't be tweeted because it's a canarial disease.

What do birds give out on Halloween?

Tweets.