Why don't you ask Joseph, the carpenter?

God: Uh huge grin cos I'm banging his wife raises hand up top

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What do you do when your wife starts smoking?

Slow down and apply lube

What's blue, standing in the kitchen?

STFU, I can paint my wife any colour I want!

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Where do you see yourself exploding in five years?

They asked.

What did Gandhi say to the British, after they asked him to move?

Nah, mastay

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What's the worst part about meeting someone with Parkinson's?

Shaking hands.

How did Pinocchio realize he was made of wood?

His hand caught on fire.

Raise Jokes More Raise Jokes

Why do tomcats fight?

Because they like raising a stink!

Why are gorillas so noisy?

They were raised in a zoo!

God Jokes More God Jokes

What is the difference between Kanye West and God?

God doesn't think that He's Kanye.

Why doesn't God like pizza?

Because he doesn't exist.

Bang Jokes More Bang Jokes

What do you get when you cross a drunk woman with a tactical grenade?

Flash-banged.)

What sound does Korean bread make when it hits a wall?

Bang! (!)

Carpenter Jokes More Carpenter Jokes

Why did the carpenter join the army?

Because he wanted to be a Drill Sergeant

Why did the Carpenters wife leave him?

Because he was screwing around.

Joseph Jokes More Joseph Jokes

How do historians know that Joseph wasn't Jesus' dad?

Because when you're a carpenter in the desert you can't get wood.

Why couldn't people find Joseph?

He was Haydn!