Amazon Prime Jokes

Why do fanfic writers like Amazon Prime?

They get free two-day shipping.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

$19.99

Whats the derivative of Amazon?

Amazon prime.

What's the difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River?

The Amazon River actually has sails.

What's the worst cut of steak?

Amazon Prime.

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Steak Jokes More Steak Jokes

What food do vampires hate?

Steaks.

How did you find your steak sir?

Customer: Oh I just moved the potatoes and there it was!

Brother Jokes More Brother Jokes

Why can't Thor play the piano or hide n seek with his brother?

He can never find the Loki.

Why did Vanilla Ice steal a can of hair spray?

Because the label said, "Contents Under Pressure" Got this joke from my brother

Sail Jokes More Sail Jokes

When is the best time to sail?

Schooner than later.

When do you know you are getting a good deal on a boat?

When there's a sail on it.

Prime Jokes More Prime Jokes

Why is Michael Jordan's Jersey number 23?

Because then he will always be in prime.

Thanksgiving Jokes More Thanksgiving Jokes

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

How did you burn the Thanksgiving Turkey?

Me: I followed the directions. 20 minutes a pound at 325 degrees. I weigh 175 pounds!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a government bond and a man?

The bond matures.*

What's the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man one bicycle?

A tire.

Humanity Jokes More Humanity Jokes

When I lose faith in humanity, I think of Chili's just handing out sick, light-up beepers, trusting us to return them. And know what?

We do.

What can stop supervirus from destroying humanity?

Batvirus (stolen joke xD)

Good Food Jokes More Good Food Jokes

Which pirate makes the best food?

Captain Cook.

What is the best food to order from Amazon?

Prime Rib