Chicken Egg Jokes

How many chicken eggs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Literally dozens.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

What do you call an egg that's scared?

A chicken egg.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why would my wife ask if I was wearing this shirt when it's already on?

Stop talking in secret code.

Why couldn't the duck stop smoking?

Because he was a quack addict

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between astronomy & astrology?

Me: Approximately 50-60 IQ points.

What is the difference between the avian flu and the swine flu?

One requires a tweetment and the other need an oinkment.

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

What did the man who ate a clock say?

That was time consuming but I still want seconds.

Why are setups to jokes so important?

Because seven ate nine.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What is this alien looking thing in a wig trying to sing?

Oh wait thats Nicki Minaj. Why would an alien in a wig pick Nicki Minaj as a name

How do you get over trophobia?

Look at the hole photo for 30 seconds straight

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What does a black and white bear use to cook its dinner?

A pan, duh!

What did Sherlock ask his friend when he wanted to know what they were having for dinner?

Watson the menu

Sheet Jokes More Sheet Jokes

What do you call a ghost at midnight?

A sheet in the dark!

How can you tell if a ghost is about to faint?

He gets pale as a sheet.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Why did Santa divorce Mrs Clause?

Because he only came once a year

What does one call an undertaker that's been drafted into the Military?

A Corpseman. Painfully obvious, yet a terrible play on the English language, I know. It was something I came up with a few years ago, for some unknown reason.

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

What does a girl from Arkansas say just before she loses her virginity?

Careful, dad, or you'll crush my smokes.

What happens when you smoke weed in Saudi Arabia?

You get stoned.