Disease Jokes

What disease does a married man have?

Onejina

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What do you call a Spartan king with a disease?

Leonitis

What disease do police give black people?

Glock coma

What does a neckbeard call a disease or ailment?

Ma'lady

What disease causes people to swear at the dinner table?

Gilles de la gourmette

What disease do Spartans get the most?

Leon-itis.

What country are you most likely to get a disease?

GERMany.

What disease do terrible parkers have?

Parkin'sins

What kind of disease do you get from birds?

Chirpes. It's a canarial disease, and I hear it's untweetable.

What's it called when two strains of a disease are identical?

Plague-arism

How can you tell vampirism is a disease?

On account of the coffin.

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What's the disease that slowly turns your skin black?

Rap Music

What disease do you get from kissing birds?

Chirpes. It's one of those canarial diseases. They say it's untweetable.

What do you call a disease that only effects ducks?

A mallard-y

What does a neckbeard call his imaginary girlfriend and his disease?

Ma'lady

What disease do neckbeard mosquitos give you?

M'laria.

What's the only disease a potato can get?

Tuber-culosis

What's the form of public transit most rife with filth and disease?

Let's name our sandwich shop after it

What disease is most easily contracted by touching your hands together?

The clap.

What disease does a mad scientist have?

Boffin spongiform encephalopathy

Why do lettuce, cheese, and turkey have so many diseases?

Because they're inbred

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What disease do horses fear most?

Hay Fever!

What disease did the house have?

Shingles.

Which disease do hobbits fear the most?

The Bilbonic plague.

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Poker Jokes More Poker Jokes

How does Queen Elizabeth win a game of poker?

She goes to the bathroom.

What do a good bar and a woman have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

Marry Man Jokes More Marry Man Jokes

What's the difference between a married man and a bachelor?

A bachelor will go to the fridge, sees nothing he wants, and go to bed A married man will go the bed, sees nothing he wants, and go the fridge!

What disease does a married man have?

Onejina

Spartan Jokes More Spartan Jokes

What disease do Spartans get the most?

Leon-itis.

What do you call a Spartan king with a disease?

Leonitis

Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

Why was the doctor stressed?

He was losing his patients

Why didn't the doctor use Twitter to tell the patient that he had a deadly disease?

Because the condition was untweetable.

Alzheimer Disease Jokes More Alzheimer Disease Jokes

What is the good thing about Alzheimer's disease?

That you get to meet new people everyday!

What is Alzheimer's?

WHAT IS ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE?

Canarial Disease Jokes More Canarial Disease Jokes

What disease do you get from kissing birds?

Chirpes. It's one of those canarial diseases. They say it's untweetable.

What do you get when you kiss a bird?

Chirpies. It's a Canarial Disease. It's Untweetable!

Pms Jokes More Pms Jokes

What should PMS be called?

Ovary-acting

What's the difference between mad cow disease and PMS?

Nothing.

Deadly Disease Jokes More Deadly Disease Jokes

Why didn't the doctor use Twitter to tell the patient that he had a deadly disease?

Because the condition was untweetable.

What deadly disease can bowls contract?

Ebowla