Marry Man Jokes

What's the difference between a married man and a bachelor?

A bachelor will go to the fridge, sees nothing he wants, and go to bed A married man will go the bed, sees nothing he wants, and go the fridge!

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What disease does a married man have?

Onejina

What's the worst they could say? No?

I'm a married man, I hear no at least two times a week.

Why does the army want to only recruit married men?

Because they don't want a man lost!

Why do married men love golf so much?

Because it's not the same three holes over and over again.

Why do single men live longer than married men?

Because they want to.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do men like breasts so much?

They prove men can concentrate on two things at once.

What'll happen if a piano is dropped on a man?

He will B flat

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What does Santa call his wife at tax time?

A dependent Claus.

What's the difference between wife and a blue whale?

About 10 pounds.

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?

Get married on his birthday.

What's the best way to start an underwear presentation?

Start with a brief introduction.

Prime Mate Jokes More Prime Mate Jokes

Why did the man marry a monkey?

Because he wanted a PRIME-MATE! sorry...sorry twice if this is an old joke

What did the Gorilla call his first wife?

His prime-mate!

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

What type of fruit is not allowed to get married?

Cantaloupe...

What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on others the Pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?

Surname

Pope Jokes More Pope Jokes

What's the difference between A pope and THE pope?

Bout tree fiddy.

What did the pope say when he spilled the sacramental wine?

Do we have any papal towels

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

Whats th first joke you remember hearing or that you told as a kid?

Mine is: What is the white stuff in bird poop? (That is also bird poop.) edit: til you can't edit the topic to fix spelling errors...

Why are blond jokes so short?

So men can remember them.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What is the worst thing to happen to an anagrammer?

It is to get West Nile in the stew line.

What happened when the man couldn't afford the mortgage on his haunted house?

It was repossessed!