Old Joke Jokes

Why did the man marry a monkey?

Because he wanted a PRIME-MATE! sorry...sorry twice if this is an old joke

Couple's Daily Question Mug

What gets you a downvote?

Reposting an old joke that wasn't funny the first time. What gets you an upvote? Posting an original joke, or a funny joke I've heard before. What get's you 5 upvotes? Being

What's the most oldest joke in the world?

The human race.

What do you call an old joke which someone has put on r/jokes?

A historepost.

What's the difference between an old joke and a new one?

Nothing. We're on reddit

What is the oldest joke in the book?

The first one written

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How many paranoids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Who wants to know?

What is a paranoid man's favorite food?

Who wants to know?

Zero Jokes More Zero Jokes

What did the zero say to the eight?

Nice belt.

How many people at a Music Festival does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Zero, its already lit

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

Which former pop star would be most likely to help deliver a baby?

Paula Ab-doula

What did the horse say when he fell over?

Help! I've fallen and I can't giddy up.

Favorite Joke Jokes More Favorite Joke Jokes

What do you call it when you second guess your decision to book a stay at a Native American resort?

A reservation reservation reservation. Credit to Brian Regan, this is my favorite joke of his!

What is your favorite joke about women?

Q: Why don't women wear watches? A: Because there is a clock on the stove.

Boy Jokes More Boy Jokes

Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school.

What's he like?

Asked the police officer sympathetically. The boy replied, "Beer and women."

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the only thing that could have saved George Michael?

A whambulance

Why don't Geordies use scales?

Because they can weigh things by eye man.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What do women and police cars have in common?

They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.

What do you call an empty cheese whiz jar?

Cheese Was! some old guy came up to me on the street and told me this one.

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What does the Michael Jackson action figure have written on the back of the box?

Not suitable for children. Colors may vary.